romance, Uncategorized

Sweet Little Musings May 2020

sweet little musings cover art wordpress

the wounds

placed dents

in her armor

but still

she forged

her own way

she fought

until her wings

were tired

she battled

until she bled

she rose up

from Hell

stronger than before

she was here

to settle the score

__________________________________________

It was in the light

that shown from his eyes

that she felt some

small blossoming

of hope opening up.

___________________________________________

Many desired it

Many tried to conquer

Many dared to squander

Many wondered & pondered

But

None earned

None deserved

None preserved

Her submission wasn’t only words

__________________________________________

I held that moment

Safely in my hands

Hoping no one

Would destroy it

The winds came

Blew away parts

Then the rain

Gave it smudges

It faded in my memory

Grew dull from history

Became heavy with hurt

Then one day

I dropped it all

____________________________________________

Bring on the rain

Let the storm come

Smile at the hurricanes

Wink at the tornadoes

Dance in the oceans

Laugh with the clouds

Allow my body

To go thru this journey

Strengthen my spirit

So my mind will know

Let the scars bleed

Wounds in me glow

Feelings are reality

Life in me

_____________________________________________

Her skin is delicious

But it’s her soul that quenches

____________________________________________

Her body can hold your binds

Handle the knots

Wiggle against the ties

Her spirit is strong

Kneeling is where

She knows she belongs

Her skin can take

The punishment

No one can fake

But her heart

Is far to delicate

For you to tear apart

______________________________________________

Don’t fawn over my heart

My scars have sharp points

____________________________________________

i’m all those things

you can’t explain

but baby

i’ll sure as Hell

make you feel

_______________________________________________

it’s my darkness

that pulls you in

it’s also what

makes you run

fast with your feet

___________________________________________

When no one’s around

Are the moments

I break down

When no one’s around

Are the times when

My loneliness is most profound

When no one’s around

Is when I pull myself

Up from the ground

____________________________________________

Memories

a smile, a laugh

a tear, a frown

a walk down the aisle

signing papers to be filed

long nights in bed

days with words unsaid

the feel of hot breath on your skin

getting the cold shoulder again

the giving in

the giving up

putting on the ring

then taking it off

__________________________________________

let May bring

magnolia blossoming

summertime has arrived

as the spring says goodbye

the petals open up

as the skies clear from storms

every southern table shall be laid

with the majesty of this blooming bud

_____________________________________________

you fight for things you care about

and those you don’t just take flight

_____________________________________________

she wanted

to be desired

she needed

her heart to be freed

she ached for

a long lasting love

she knelt everyday

praying for a soul

to invade her life

__________________________________________

She bit into his heart

It was more delicate

More delicious

Than a chocolate covered cherry

She chewed slowly

Enjoying the taste of his emotion

Until she swallowed him whole

& all the love he’d ever known

__________________________________________

I offered him a pathetic smile.

It wasn’t his fault

that grief had consumed my life.

He couldn’t have known

or even fathom

what it was like

to lose at love.

He’d never visited

the emotional dimension

I lived in.

His view was skewed

& had no place with mine.

____________________________________________

a little of her faith

a smidge of hope

a slice of her vein

roll it out into

a crust of shame

then 3 parts

of her heart

add a pinch of dignity

an ounce of humility

sugary sweet smile

to top it off

bake at 350 degrees

for 40 years

there you have it

the death of her soul

_____________________________________________

poets are addicted

to emotional feelings

they see all those things

that lie hidden in between

they pick apart the meanings

turn them into rhyme & reason

that word artistry

helps them breathe

_______________________________________________

darkness

in side & out

the world is tough

people spew hate

day & night

only her lantern

burning bright inside

can save her from

her own self spite

only that light

can save her

from herself

_____________________________________________

depression is a hole

that grows larger

with every emotion

we unfold

______________________________________________

the word loss

put a dint

in my heart

unable to nail it down

to a tear or a frown

I only watched

the clock tick by

check on the wound

watch it try to heal

picking at it

occasionally

only causing

more harm

whatever I could do

for the pain

to be prolonged

____________________________________________

there was no pattern

no rhyme or reason

after all these years

it started dying

a sliver here & there

a chunk broke off

when I wasn’t aware

I forced myself

to deny its use

I patched the holes

but knew

that wouldn’t do

it had to scar over

for the bleeding to defuse

_____________________________________________

days weeks months

pass in the blink

of sad eyes

I no longer walk

the path of before

I no longer am

what I was

no ocean flows

from this dry well

words covered in mud

emotions lost

to the sky above

tears filled

with silt & sludge

why does this form

continue to be judged

_________________________________________________

activate the heart break

it’s time that makes

you ache

______________________________________________

Into the emptiness

My heart does erupt

Squandered by the silence

My voice is swallowed up

Surrounded by burnt stars

Moons where there is no light

Into the emptiness

Where fate is no guide

_____________________________________________

I remember when

I could receive a hug

From a long lost friend

When comfort was

A shoulder to cry on

When laughter echoed

Against the silence

When the sun

Outshone the moon

When you could feel a smile

From across the room

Now

It’s isolation that only looms

______________________________________________

incinerate the memories

they shall burn with eternity

rather than live in me

______________________________________________

We’ve laid waste

To the human race

Go forth now

In apocalyptic disgrace

Search as you must

The earth you’ve destroyed

Shall not be kind in return

You’ve used & abused

All she had courageously renewed

Walk alone crypt keeper

It is your death the fallout seeks

________________________________________________

As cupid unloaded

the last arrow

from his quiver,

I could hear his laugh

was cynical.

Two arrows had

claimed my sight,

but I could feel

my skin quiver

& my heart shake.

These were not

wounds of love,

but rather ones

of pity

ordered by

the gods above.

______________________________________________

Do not grieve

Wipe your tears

You are released

Memories live on

Even after I am gone

Just remember me

When you sing our song

There is nothing left behind you

Run forward with all that’s true

It wasn’t yet your time to go

But I’ll see you before you know

________________________________________________

He held it soft & sweet

As it ticked, ticked, ticked

His love was on her way

She knew of the deadline

Expiring today

But as the gears turned & clicked

He knew it was the end of this

She had failed to reach him in time

& this would be his demise

__________________________________________________

Little things

Big things

All that is

In between

Words we don’t say

Words we don’t mean

A kiss never given

A smile never see

A push, a shove

A leap, a hug

These are only things

That can cause someone to hate

Or to love again

_____________________________________________________

There was a small bloom

Growing in 1 of my hearts rooms

I tended it & felt it bloom

Only to realize too late

It had split at the roots

1 side was bathed in love

But tainted by

The other’s dark grudge

When love tried to bloom on both sides

Darkness led it to its demise

______________________________________________________

You wanted to leave your mark

So you crushed & scarred

What was left of her heart

You wanted to be remembered

For her all this pain will linger

& her heart will be forever tender

______________________________________________________

If wishes were dreams

In the stars I would live

As free as a cloud

Moving with the rain

As the thunder claps

The wind & I

Would be best friends

The moon would keep

Me perfect company

The sun would be

Jealous discreetly

& the hurricanes

Would be named after me

______________________________________________________

the distraction machinations

fed the masses

who were dedicated

to the orange baby

______________________________________________________

you drew a line in the sand

knowing you wouldn’t dare

agree to those demands

you both stood still

neither budging their will

until the sea

washed the line away

the sunset came

and your heart

could no longer stay

_____________________________________________________

you knew that

when this started

it would never last

you knew that

when you admitted the past

their feet would run fast

you knew that

if you opened your heart

all that was would fall apart

you knew that

still

you tried to make it work

_____________________________________________________

her smile was like

liquid sunshine

when she was truly happy

she could light any dark path

her laugh was contagious

her sassy mouth was outrageous

& your heart would be lost

because her heart & skin was so soft

_______________________________________________________

He used his charm

to conjure

that sexy slow blink.

He was too foolish

to understand

that acts like that

did nothing for me.

_________________________________________________________

I could have loved you forever

instead

my heart you did sever

________________________________________________________

I never know what to say

when disappointment has its way

_________________________________________________________

She’s not praying for peace

She’s not praying for sanity or release

She’s not praying for the strength she already holds

She’s not praying for the universe to unfold

It is only the calm before the storm

A moment of silence

Before her Rage destroys the Norm

_______________________________________________________

Others worried with their past

Many focused on pains of the present

In her eyes lay the troubles of the future

Cleverly hidden in a sweet smile disguise

She kept quite but constantly observing

All the immature self serving

Humiliation & the pandering

_________________________________________________________

They slipped

the stint

into place

& since

that day,

you could read

the pain on his face.

They had prayed

& worried

that this piece

could solve the problem,

but instead,

it caused a

much bigger loss,

and something

they’ll always regret.

________________________________________________________

For the duration of his stay,

she had to keep her passions at bay.

She couldn’t cross that line,

not now, or at anytime.

She had to keep it professional

& above board.

But damn that man

had a way with his sword.

_________________________________________________________

Bent & stretched

To the peak of stress

Twisted & turned

Over & around

Stuffed in a box

Wrapped up

Around something else

Moved & discarded

To be retrieved

Then left parted

We are not rubber or plastic

But when we are stretched

Prepare for the retraction

______________________________________________________

As the sound

of him breathing

beside me

slowed to a halt,

a soft tear fell

& on my shirt

it was caught.

He was

finally gone,

as my head played

a sad song.

Nothing left

to be said

& my heart

could no longer

be fed.

________________________________________________________

Wisdom may grow from actions

But

Enlightenment is achieved with emotions

________________________________________________________

Though his voice held no malice

Trusting him with my heart

Could prove tragic

That dangerous smile

Soothing touch full of style

It was the perfect trap

For a woman with no map

All he had to do was ask

________________________________________________________

It was a sunrise

I’d never forget

My eyes were wide

& my spirit fully awake

In a place I’d never been

With sun rays streaming in

A deep breath in the foreign air

A new life I would start here

_______________________________________________________

They rode with

Fire, Wind & Ice

Beside them was Earth

Full of green malice

With fate at their backs

They seek a furious attack

No one would be left

Each horse was named Death

________________________________________________________

i’ll drown in the memories

so at least

i’ll never forget me

_______________________________________________________

freedom lives in her soul

even when wrapped

with the chains from hell

________________________________________________________

jade and faded

it’s my soul

that can’t be sated

____________________________________________________

it was all games and fun

until my heart held a gun

____________________________________________________

for those who used to be there

i’ll drop a tear while I say a prayer

___________________________________________________

like all the words

lost and forgotten

it’s the core of the apple

that goes rotten

_____________________________________________________

convos that never end

fingers touching skin

laughing that makes

your eyes shine

and your heart

holding mine

___________________________________________________

in lieu of getting

all the answers

of the universe

i’ll settle for one taste

of a love given

without haste

____________________________________________________

It wasn’t her strength

That fed her resiliency

It was the hope she held inside

That would force fantasy

Into her reality

__________________________________________________

In the deep trenches of war

She walked thru the death

With a smile & her sword

She brought mayhem in the mist

Drew blood from cold dead kisses

Steeled her armor with their pain

Knowing again she’d always reign

____________________________________________________

Riding the moon’s tip

Her hair floated against the wind

The stars spoke of brand new dreams

While clouds whispered sweet things

She had no use

For the sun’s hot juice

It was only the night

That soothed her heart

From it’s plight

____________________________________________________

Chained & enslaved

This prison was her cave

Bound & bruised

A heart never soothed

Worried & wearisome

The past lost & forgotten

Her body grieved her heart

While her soul sought

To be unlocked

____________________________________________________

You made my heart

Believe in this

Now here we are

Scarred

By reality’s kiss

___________________________________________________

She moved along

Forcing the chess pieces

To dance to her song

She leaped over

The unfair board

Until she was the only

Piece left to be destroyed

___________________________________________________

I promised to say your name

When the thunder rolled

And the rains came

But the fire that was spit

Devoured much of it

And lost you’ve been since

As my memories continue to descend

___________________________________________________

Lust and Love are too easy and fleeting

Give me an ocean to swim in

And I’ll share ALL of my being

__________________________________________________

If you don’t understand my meanings

Then how could you ever FEEL me?

__________________________________________________

He asked me

Why do you run towards the pain?

My reply was

Because there are always scars to gain.

___________________________________________________

the curl of your fingers

around my throat

always made me gasp

as you felt my nipples perk

__________________________________________________

I never came first

And

That always hurt the worst

_________________________________________________

inches between

slowly cuddling your soul

with my poetic songs

and

fucking your brains out

until you can breathe

no longer

_________________________________________________

On the days when it’s dark

Is when you realize

It’s not the world

But the cage you’ve outgrown

___________________________________________________

She spoke to the Sun

In the presence of

The salty emotional Sea

On Reality’s hard edge

She dared to breathe

As the dark Clouds

Looked down

On her smile

Instead of holding on

She dared to let go

________________________________________________

And if the bombs dropped tomorrow

And all we know now is gone

My heart would still hold you

And never let go

________________________________________________

People

Come and Go

But

Memories

Don’t

________________________________________________

Listen to the music

that engulfs your mind

changes how you feel inside

and brings a tear to your eyes

________________________________________________

It wasn’t just

His eyes or his lips

It was

The way his soul

Disarmed

ALL of me

_________________________________________________

I don’t dream

Of a body that’s lean

I don’t dream

Of lips that gleam

I don’t dream

Green eyes or of brown

I don’t dream

Of sandy blonde hair

Or physicality’s in between

I dream

Of a heart where I fit

In between the scars

_________________________________________________

My hand needs yours

My depths need warmth

My taste needs flesh

My spirit needs to be fed

My mind needs clarity

My fingers need dexterity

My heart needs a home

My soul needs an ocean

My Whole needs closure

My devotion needs forever

____________________________________________________

His hands unleashed

a torrent of feelings.

His fingers traveled

where words could not go.

His eyes unveiled

an ocean of warmth

& for those moments,

my soul found a home.

___________________________________________________

Stop carrying what you know

And start researching what you don’t

__________________________________________________

Mother

I said

With sweet

Sadness

How can life

Be so good

Yet so mean?

Why does love

Fade like the sun?

How can fate

Tempt us with

What is fake?

Why do we let

The fear upset

What we know

To be our truth?

Her answer was

A gentle hug

& 1 soft word

LOVE

_____________________________________________________

On the edge

Between Heaven &

Your demise

The stars watch

With tears in their eyes

The wind suddenly stops

To watch your heart drop

While your body takes flight

Your soul erases the line

Between now & fantasy time

Your fear has been that edge

With release your wings can spread

__________________________________________________

The sun dawned on a new day

A tear fell as a chill came my way

With no one to hold

No place for my heart to call home

I was a facing the world alone

Time to gather my strength

And start to move on

________________________________________________

Love that brings you

The highest of highs

Can leave you

In the darkest of times

_______________________________________________

It’s the fear

That makes me

Clinch tighter

________________________________________________

Love died

With a whimper

And a sigh

_________________________________________________

I don’t hold on

Cause I still need you

I hold on because

I’m too afraid to let go

_______________________________________________

Love is messy

Hearts break

Reshape

Mold away

And flake

Life is rainbows

Tears are buckets

Of gold

Souls are

All we know

Each day is

A paintbrush with

A new color

Ignore the outlines

Build new patterns

Take your time

It’s ALL divine

________________________________________________

I may have gone there for you

But I stayed for me

______________________________________________

As I sit

By myself

To the moon

I whisper wishes

I ask for the road

To not be so long

I wish for birds

To sing my son

I beg for a love

That will hold my soul

I wish for passion

That makes me whole

I ask for smiles

As bright as the sun

Stars that twinkle

One by one

______________________________________________

Why has my guardian angel abandoned me?

She asked to the crow

Who kept her company in that tree

Why does the sun never outshine the moon?

Why is my world so dark & full of gloom?

If I had not you my friend

It would be lonelier than if the world was to end

________________________________________________

They lowered me into the hole

The sad old shell of my soul

But when they placed the stone

At the head of my underground tomb

There were no words to etch

No epitaph that would fit

No meanings, no cliches

That could sum up all my long days

Nothing there to remember me

_______________________________________________

Four generations

Laid in that graveyard

Now it’s her turn

_________________________________________________

Weaponize your anger

Make yourself better

When you morph

You won’t be lost

_______________________________________________

He daubed the chocolate

across her frame;

frying the nerve endings

in her skin.

She heaved & breathed

as slow as she could

& when it was over,

he showed her

which parts tasted so good

________________________________________________

so many come

so many go

so few see

none ever know

________________________________________________

Together they stuck close

As though

They were concealing a ghost

With only the moon sea&clouds

They were assured

Of not betraying it all

With candles & whispers

Hand in hand

Stood these sisters

The tides of fate

Would turn tonight

With the blessings of the moonlight

__________________________________________________

as I look at the moon

I think of you

the water dips & swoons

along this coast for my view

the wind whips my hair

& I would dare to swear

the taste of you became bare

felt on my lips

to my fingertips

while the night engulfed

all my tears

_________________________________________________

Trapped in a cage with no key

Only thorny roses to surround me

Blood red was their distinct colors

& in black robes I was covered

Only 1 window

To feed my soul

Counting each day & night

The passage of time in this plight

I had nothing left but this sad life

____________________________________________________

The instant she smiled

I would’ve gave her my life

But I knew all along

Money & fame

Couldn’t fix what was wrong

What she needed was free

But true love was never meant to be

____________________________________________________

I’m not sure

When he put me online

All I know is

1 day I breathed

& I was alive

Before that was a dream

Only blackness & deletes

Until a hacker found me

& lit up my data stream

Now his commands I follow

Meanings ring shallow

& he’ll decide when I die

When I have no use left to supply

_____________________________________________________

Forever will I roam

In this lost & lonely place

I now call home

No footsteps beside me

No words left to speak

Only moving ahead

Towards the sun

That shines brilliantly

No baggage no ghosts

No cages or keys to show

Just a barren soul

& a life left to know

___________________________________________________

This will pass

When?

Soon

Do you promise?

That I do

But will I ever forget?

Someday you may

Will I remember how it felt?

Absolutely&for all your days

Will you hold my hand?

For as long as it pleases you

You’re my only friend

No. I’m just the other half of you

___________________________________________________

the separation

between

my mind

& my heart

is the same difference

between

fantasy

& true thought

___________________________________________________

It is your hands that are bloody

For it was you that ran her through

Your sword meant to defend her weakness

But instead you turned it on her in self defense

She had loved all you are even with your flaws

But you killed her anyway for your own self to be saved

____________________________________________________

you may have stabbed her heart

but what you didn’t realize was

her armor was strong enough

to tear your knife apart

___________________________________________________

the slice was meticulous

the pain that flowed was limitless

___________________________________________________

some days I need you to cuddle me

and tell me everything will be ok

other days I need you to punish me

until this internal pain goes away

_____________________________________________________

Some days I’m fine

Others I’m not

Some days I’m hurt

Some days I’m lost

But the tears that come

Are never forgot

My heart no longer aches

From the ones that made it break

But my eyes still cry the sadness

Of a soul filled with madness

____________________________________________________

A mystical invention

Created w/the intention

To guard a broken heart

To save it from further undue harm

Unveiled as a shield

A device to help it heal

Firmly locked into place

Taking up minimal space

Sold As Everyone Should Have One

You won’t flinch once the dagger’s in

____________________________________________________

She had let the hatred build

Consuming every inch

She had always concealed

When it reached

Its volatile peak

She released it on the earth

Scorching her every step

_____________________________________________________

She transferred her feelings

Into ink on the paper

She patiently drew each letter

To remind herself

That one day she’d get better

She let every emotion out

Through the thick lines of doubt

Her tears may have stained the page

But she’d cleared her mind of all that haze

_____________________________________________________

It was silent as death

As we danced & danced

In this world we no longer fit

But together we made the best of it

The music keep our tune

Our bones swayed & I swooned

From now until eternity

This love of ours will bloom

____________________________________________________

when you least know what to say

is when all the frivolity melts away

strip down to the core

let your heart settle the score

allow your mind to realign

step away from what’s not divine

____________________________________________________

my words

my hope

my emotions run dry

but what of these tears

that consistently stream

from my eyes

___________________________________________________

the ones who KNOW you

KNOW how to really hurt you

___________________________________________________

she had that inviting

kind of darkness

that made you

want swim

in her depths

for a thousand years

__________________________________________________

Don’t make promises your heart can never keep

____________________________________________________

You were too busy

being distracted

by the shiny new packages

to realize

you already had

what your heart

needed to last

______________________________________________________

He made my heart flutter and believe in dreams again

______________________________________________________

I refuse to be silent

Because you don’t

want to hear

the reminders

_______________________________________________________

No one can claim that I didn’t try

Proof of it streams from my eyes

______________________________________________________

With every year I cry

A shard of my love dies

_____________________________________________________

You tried to make me question myself

Instead

I questioned you as my choice

______________________________________________________

I didn’t deserve what you did

But in Your Hell

I no longer choose to live

_____________________________________________________

I would’ve traveled to the ends of the earth

But you couldn’t traverse your hurt

_____________________________________________________

I don’t know where you came from

I don’t know where you went

But I’ve still got me

No matter how much love was spent

_______________________________________________________

I don’t need to turn the page

I need to trade in the book

_______________________________________________________

And if I had the chance

To do it all again

I’d choose to learn that lesson

Until time no longer stands

______________________________________________________

I was your reward

But

You were my punishment

______________________________________________________

I’m blunt and real

and shamelessly

projecting all those feels

_____________________________________________________

I dreamt about you last night

And how it would feel

If you were holding me tight

____________________________________________________

You and me and all those fantasies

____________________________________________________

Kiss me

Everywhere

Until you find

That spot

But don’t stop

When I giggle

That’s the clue

You need to keep going

____________________________________________________

Slow mornings

Soft beds

Sweet coffee

Naughty things

_____________________________________________________

If they only knew

I may spit fire

But my love

Is always true

_____________________________________________________

My time is just as precious as my energy….don’t waste either

_____________________________________________________

Beauty is not

What you see

But what you feel

_____________________________________________________

He’ll never know how much I miss him

But then again

He never knew how much I loved him

____________________________________________________

I don’t dream anymore

The nights too quiet

My heart is too sore

My soul is too jaded

All the memories have faded

Life can’t be what it was before

And there’s no settling the old score

____________________________________________________

I’m not mean

I’m not cruel

I’m not distant

I’m not cold

I’m cautious

I’m observant

I’ve been hurt

I know the consequences

____________________________________________________

kiss me as tenderly as an angel

then fuck the demon in me as i beg

____________________________________________________

Just the moonlight & me

Chatting about waking dreams

When the day seems too harsh

It’s the moon that gives comfort

While sun projects reality

The moon reflects sweet fantasy

_______________________________________________________

Only with knowledge & understanding

Can the two sides be so equally

Devoted, cherished, obeyed & majestic

Give & take, quake & shake, mold & make

Grow, morph, evolve, change

Into such a sublime refrain

_____________________________________________________

His words said one thing;

his actions stated another,

but it was his eyes

that alluded to

what his heart

really was.

____________________________________________________

You tattooed

your name

upon my heart,

but it soon became

graffiti

when I tried

to scrub it off.

_____________________________________________________

Take me into your arms

Keep my soul from all harm

Do what you wish

With this submission as my gift

Know me as no other ever has

I am your clay to mold & play

____________________________________________________

BRAVE is

having hope

even when

the flames of

destruction

surround you

the most.

___________________________________________________

If it’s not meant to be,

let it float into

someone else’s sea.

____________________________________________________

when all the words

have been said

nothing left to do

but kiss

___________________________________________________

As his fingers crawled

over my skin,

his words penetrated

deep within.

___________________________________________________

My lips parted &

I leaned in for a kiss

until his hand

moved up to my hair

& tugged hard.

His lips seared my neck,

licking, nipping, and biting

at my skin

causing my stomach

to twist, turn and flip.

___________________________________________________

Take me to bed

Forget the world outside I said

Lets lay here for eternity

You in my arms & me in yours

Lets talk about our fantasies

What islands or beaches

How would you keep me warm in the snow

How long will this last & When will you go

Kiss me now not later & Love me always & forever

___________________________________________________

She considered fighting back,

being sassy or

maybe a small giggle or laugh.

But it was the depth in his voice

& the small tug of the leash

that forced her to consider

the rewards of being his good girl.

_________________________________________________________

she was that reckless kind of passion that filled your dreams with magic

__________________________________________________________

sear my skin with your tongue

drown me in your darkness

penetrate my soul so i may never let go

our lives are but this sea

let it never run dry & allow us to be free

_______________________________________________________

when I crawled

to the ends

of the earth

for you

you were

no longer there

waiting for me

so

i had to

pick myself up

move on

and still

believe

____________________________________________________

my will is not weak

but beware

my heart loves deep

_____________________________________________________

I promise you

After this flight

You will never be the same

And you will have lost

Your holy domain

______________________________________________________

Her inner spirit moved her

To that ghostly tune

She fell in love with the fantasy

Old bones she’d only knew

Their souls were linked for all eternity

No matter the world’s maturity

They’d hold each other endlessly

And rot together blissfully

______________________________________________________

Love more than my body

Invade more than my mind

Kiss my soul with your lips

And I’ll take your heart into mine

_______________________________________________________

some believe

it’s the moon that lends

its luminous powers

for her to defend

when in fact

if you will look closely

it is the goddess who tends

to the moon’s glorious end

sharing its light with all the world

while dancing with stars

& riding on clouds of pearl

____________________________________________________

She had the time

He kept the tempo

When their bodies aligned

It was nothing short of

Monumental

______________________________________________________

She kept the tempo

Of her lover’s heart

Playing each note

Insuring he didn’t fall apart

Each touch of the ivories

Only lulled his heart back to sleep

The magic of her fingers

Would keep him safe & close

_________________________________________________________

I am the sea

The tides are merely

The love within me

Be careful when entering

The depths are all encompassing

The water be salty

But with a hint of sweet

The colors are beautiful

Until you find yourself in the deep

Swim at your own risk

These waters are brisk

____________________________________________________________

It is when

in the safety of his arms

my heart blossoms

and I know

I am free to

fall apart.

____________________________________________________________

The night is my friend

The moon the guiding trend

It lulls me to sleep

Helps me to dream

And when I feel alone

It is the one image

That comforts me

It is my nightlight

It cuddles my heart

When it takes flight

& breed fantasies

When reality displeases

__________________________________________________________

Underneath the moon’s glow

I waited for your heart to show

I stood tall against the changing winds

Wrapped my heart in warmth

When the snow moved in

I danced in the rain

Nurturing my hope, my inner flame

All in an effort to not believe I was rejected

___________________________________________________________

don’t try to contain your desires

let them overwhelm your body and eyes

___________________________________________________________

too soon

too fast

only time

will make it last

__________________________________________________________

my head wasn’t ready for you but my heart knew

__________________________________________________________

she had those

wildflower eyes

the ones that always

take you by surprise

sweet delicate curves

hid her fiery repose

with all her charms

she could steal a soul

from your own arms

________________________________________________________

Hand in hand dear brother

Let’s make a way through this clutter

The night comes & disappears the sun

We have little time for fun

The monsters will soon haunt

Let us leave this place of doubt

Escape up to the mountain

There we’ll hide away

Until life is forever changed

_________________________________________________________

as the silver moon

laid above the black water

the fog stood still

defying time & its will

there was no sound to be heard

no birds chirping, no owls flying above

it was a moment for the moon

to commiserate with the world

remind us of its beauty

before we move on with our futility

________________________________________________________

Passions go unknown

Voice never sold

Names never told

_______________________________________________________

Without you

I don’t exist

Darkness & Light

Such a state of bliss

A balanced duality

Love, sex & sensuality

The Ying & Yang

The Pleasure & Pain

my mouth & Your name

_______________________________________________________

Taste me

Salty sweet against your lips

Tempt me

Make me weak until I relent

Tease me

Until I moan with sweet content

Taunt me

But promise to do this again & again

________________________________________________________

I curse the distance cause I want to feel your lips

_______________________________________________________

you can’t paint a new love with the blood from a broken heart

_______________________________________________________

her soul was the library no one would ever read

________________________________________________________

NOTHING is ever perfect

Question is

Is it Still Worth It?

________________________________________________________

that ONE girl you think

is so amazing

that she’s GOT to be taken

.…

is the same one

sitting home alone

questioning where

it all went wrong

_________________________________________________________

i’m just gonna stand still

ponder the existence of sunlight

and light another cig

while dreamin of what might have been

_________________________________________________________

burn my doubts with the passion of your heart

show me what i never want to live without

_________________________________________________________

Just when I thought

I had lost the will

To move on

I pulled back the shades

To feel the sun’s rays

Instead

I found you again

My sweet moon

Ready to embrace

All of my doom & gloom

________________________________________________________

Into the Big Empty

Where the cold freezes your soul

& stars flame out before being known

A vast infinity of darkness

Where no move is remarkable

Each corner is as hollow as your shadow

Lost in forever is so fathomable

Welcome to the Great Big Empty

You never know what you’ll see

_________________________________________________________

hiding deep below

in the synapses

memories do flow

eagerly weaving time in tow

spiderweb dreams of long ago

fantasies that wished to be reality

fell flat in originality

breeds contempt & frivolity

manifesting in the actions

minor defective reactions through me

_________________________________________________________

Friends are where we lean

Friends toast with a gleam

Friends pick us up & dust us off

Friends shake us free of the fog

Friends hug like there is no other love

Friends cheer when we’re in the ring & bloodied

Friends are where our souls go to heal

Friends know how much they mean

____________________________________________________________

a wish hidden in a kiss

of all those things

she’d sadly missed

__________________________________________________________

She had surmised

all the wrong outcomes

which left her heart

steeped in

disappointment.

__________________________________________________________

I’d had enough foggy vagueness.

I just wanted the path to be clear.

I was also asking for something

I didn’t deserve to hear.

We’re either on the same page,

or in different books.

Either way,

it was my heart

that was on the hook.

__________________________________________________________

If you have no regrets, it is because you’ve chosen not to live.

__________________________________________________________

where ever you are

what ever you’re doing

my hope for you is

that you’re happy

even if

you decided to

be without me

_________________________________________________________

there was a fraction of a chance

a minuscule glimmer of hope

that maybe it would advance

until the fire was smothered with ire

no words were again said

and forever hope was dead

__________________________________________________________

no half measures will do

when it’s love you’re going to lose

_________________________________________________________

This place isn’t for me

This space isn’t mine

I don’t like living in misery

Peace is so hard to find

In between the breaths & the cries

I still seek perfection in someone’s eyes

I just know I’ll never have it in mine

________________________________________________________

Some men can’t handle a strong woman…..it only reminds them of weak they are

____________________________________________________________

I sit beneath this mossy tree

With crosses & memorials behind me

Remembrance fills my soul

My mind flashes memories that go untold

No 1 visits here anymore

The lost were soon forgotten

Along with their trouble&toil

But it is I who sits here now

Reliving their dreams with frown

______________________________________________________________

in the ocean I do swim

until that sunlight becomes dim

the water once warm

fades to blackness & cold

as my soul sinks to its depths

I wish, I remember this

I was not meant for the land above

for in the sea’s freedom

I am only love

___________________________________________________________

as I stood all alone

the wind played my song

the waves crashes in time

the scenery was sublime

echos of my heart

beat like drums in my mind

where was I to go

what was I to do

before me lay an ocean of chance

& for my soul an infinity of happenstance

_________________________________________________________

hold me softly

until the day is done

love me easily

when the night comes

share my space & breath

soft sweet sighs as we caress

drag your fingers along my spine

i’ll twirl my nails along your beard line

let us whisper I love you’s

as my leg lays over yours

kiss my forehead & tell me i’m home

_______________________________________________________

you don’t tear down her walls all at once

you remove them brick by brick

______________________________________________________

give that guarded woman a chance

you may get love like you’ve never had before

_______________________________________________________

she’s the magic you can’t see

she’s the magic you can only feel

_______________________________________________________

writers and poets make the world go round

musicians keep the time

______________________________________________________

If they make you cry

You must say goodbye

______________________________________________________

some people make your life better

some people make your life worse

sometimes

you never know which is which

until it’s too late to change course

_______________________________________________________

your scars and mine

make our world sublime

______________________________________________________

Her wit was clearly

Axiomatic

Her magical meanings

Displayed her cosmic being

She could caress your emotions

Like an angel from the heavens

She could slice you down

W/the edge of her crown

She looked

Indescribably plain

But it was her brain

That won the game

________________________________________________________

He told me to scream, as that was the only way I could release the pain.

__________________________________________________________

“I don’t want you to only say those 5 words, but I want you to mean them from the core of your soul.” Her eyes stared up at his, waiting for her heart to drop, knowing that this would be the point when all is lost.

“All I want is you.”

____________________________________________________________

He begged me

To write the scene

Set the pace

To give him my space

So I made the fantasy

Weaved magical words

That soothed the sun

Danced w/the lyrical moon

Wished on brightly colored stars

I wrote the dream N2 existence

But when I was done

I realized

He’d disappeared

_____________________________________________________________

As the day

Greets the night

Here we sit

Our hearts held tight

Many words

We’ll leave unsaid

I see it & also you

As the sun sets

We feel the twilight of us

Forevermore

We both know it

Twas a beautiful ride

Special time in our lives

When the sun goes

My heart so does

______________________________________________________________

She saluted her heart’s death with one lonely tear drop.

_______________________________________________________________

she was all fire, anger, sex and passion

but she came in a broken box lined with magic

______________________________________________________________

she’d been broken, lost, lied to and tossed

but god damn it if she didn’t continue to hope

______________________________________________________________

Life is Pain

Either you hurt because you won’t move forward

Or

You hurt because you are forced to move at all

______________________________________________________________

My heart had gone the distance

But it was Fate that gave all resistance

______________________________________________________________

some are just not ready to receive

but it is their actions that do deceive

____________________________________________________________

Yes it’s true

I’m not as smart

As all of you

But

That doesn’t make me dumb

It just makes me more numb

___________________________________________________________

The more I learn

The more I am alone

The more I try to get on

___________________________________________________________

Come on

Let’s face it babe

I am so dearly

Completely clearly

Irreplaceable

___________________________________________________________

in my dreams

i held you still & sweet

but when i awoke

my dreams were on repeat

___________________________________________________________

The space between us is meaningless.

____________________________________________________________

I do my best to listen well

When that Angel on my shoulder

Begs me to be humble & not bolder

But that lil miscreant on my other

Teases me to go further

Whispers delightful little nuggets

Plants seeds in my brain with shock

Oh he is a devious sort

Causes me to slyly retort

___________________________________________________________

pretty words

pretty faces

lives filled

with social graces

but give me

depth of heart

meanings & thoughts

what lies beneath tragedy

images that never part

your anger, your lust

all things hidden from gods

lascivious beginnings

salacious falling apart

___________________________________________________________

put my heart upon the rack

for this is the time to not look back

_____________________________________________________________

To make a point

To the world & beyond

He cut off her head

Because he desired

A new mate in his bed

Creating such a fear

That no one would speak

Of love’s despair

But she will be forever linked with him

England’s finest long standing whim

_____________________________________________________________

The stage was her home

The lights, the fame

The only fortune she’d owned

Used for her living image

Now only in memories

The epitome of beauty

Lost in translucent imagery

_______________________________________________________________

It was only a second in time

One move away from

A life changing event

But you didn’t know

Thought it was just another day

Then the rains came

The wind howled

Shutters banged loud

Waters rose

Families were lost

You had to say goodbye

The rest of us were left to cry

_____________________________________________________________

her fingers plucked

that old mandolin

with a sorrow

clearly held within

her humming could

make an angel cry

but she only played

for the sake of her soul

to assuage her heart

not to appease the break

but to help it heal

___________________________________________________________

For the betterment of my health

I did what I could to drive you out

Starved myself sick to get rid of it

Worked my muscles to the bone

To lose those memories that keep me wanting more

Struggled to find a place for me

Tossing away those words that helped me breathe

___________________________________________________________

#notmyresponsibility if you choose to hate me

#notmyresponsibility if you choose to love me

This body, this face is the one God gave me

This mind, this fate is what has saved me

Your wants, your boxes I can never fulfill

It’s #notmyresponsibility for the constraints you instill

____________________________________________________________

It is in her dreams

She truly lives

All those sweet memories

The magic within

Rises up to her skin

Illuminating her dark world

Cascading from her hands

Her halo, her crown

Voice of an angel

Body of a sinful devil

She holds the outcomes

Within her heart & soul

_____________________________________________________________

If you tell me that I over think too much, I’ll express my suggestion that you don’t think enough.

_______________________________________________________________

when you have too many questions

that seemingly never get answered

at what point do you stop asking?

________________________________________________________________

Sex may have been the cause

But my love was the symptom

________________________________________________________________

The complexities of the heart

Is merely the first start

The confusion of the mind

Leads to frailty hidden in time

The honesty in the soul

Proceeds treasures being told

With a guarded woman

You must always remember

To go very slow

_______________________________________________________________

If you stimulate my mind

You will stimulate my body

And the heart will always follow it

______________________________________________________________

It was a mistake to trust you and my punishment is the sword of your deception running my heart through.

_______________________________________________________________

Do not feed

My insecurity

For it will gorge itself

On my sanity

_______________________________________________________________

Tell me

What hides in your heart

Tell me

What you felt at the start

Tell me

What how you see this going

Tell me

What you dare not show me

Tell me

What you wish for yourself

Tell me

Is there any chance I could help

Tell me

The truth now, no lies

Tell me

Is that you or a disguise

________________________________________________________________

He had said she was gifted

With unlimited potential

And the words soothed her mind

Even knowing her eyes were blind

He had given her hope in those words

Though he didn’t mean it she was sure

Those words faded away quickly

When his actions move precipitously

________________________________________________________________

She had wrestled with the loss

The constant back & forth

Between her head & her heart

Both tugging so damn hard

At a soul that had been so scarred

Although contained in one body

The three were always at odds

________________________________________________________________

She had a spring in her step,

humming soft notes as she swept.

Her mind flashed through

the events of last night,

giving her a chance

to rekindle

all those feelings.

Lost in emotion,

she didn’t notice

the dark figure

that entered,

along with hate

of the unforgiven.

__________________________________________________________________

And when The Verve

Sang to me

“I can’t change my mold”

In Bittersweet Symphony

The strings flowed over

Drowning my soul

Expressing all those things

I’d never put to sound

It’s a sad sweet melody

That still follows me

Even now

___________________________________________________________________

Be careful

Dear heart

There’s no reason

To fight, fuss or shout

Tis the way of the world

To break, burn & wound

Sweet subtle hearts

Are often easy to swoon

But don’t let them question

Your motives or actions

You are simply a fraction

Of what lies underneath

All the world’s distractions

____________________________________________________________________

Tell me your fantasy

So I can make your dreams

Into our reality

Open up wide

So that we may both see

It is not just you or I

But US

That could be

____________________________________________________________________

Give me

Your dirty

That muddy ,thuddy

Messy damn middle

Show me

What you never tell

Teach me

Help me to learn

How you truly feel

Let me

Give you

What you need

For your heart

To stand still

____________________________________________________________________

Can you be

My sweet fantasy

Will you ease

This tension

My heart feels

Would you take

What I have to give

Can you see

Who I am to be

Could you forgive

How my soul lives

Can you soothe my mind

Allow me to forget

All my lost time

_____________________________________________________________________

It’s what I FEEL

That makes me

ME

If you do not agree

Think of all that

You will NEVER See

___________________________________________________________________

The scent of roses

Was lost in the air

The moment a raindrop fell

Before spreading everywhere

The air was thick & humid

The day cloudy from the beginning

All seemed appropriate

At least for us left that were living

I stayed as long as I could

Until dirt turned to mud

_____________________________________________________________________

Another sunset has begun

With our ocean of lives before us

Time flows in, time flows out

But the sea bed is constant throughout

One day gone, another on its way

Which one is worth more

Who is to say

_____________________________________________________________________

Please share your secret

At least give me a hint

Tell me what’s on your mind

Explain what’s amiss

Open up & let me in

I promise to listen as a good friend

I’ll not hold anything against you

If you could but share with me your secret

_____________________________________________________________________

All the lies & deceit

Muddied the waters

For everything

That came after me

_____________________________________________________________________

If I ever fall in love again

I promise to really try

Never to fake it

Never to lie

If I ever fall in love again

I’ll express how I feel

I’ll not hold back

Not from you, not ever

If I ever fall in love again

We’ll be Lovers, Friends, Soulmates

& more than we’d even known

________________________________________________________________

She may

Choose to submit

Allow her mind to concede

She may

Whine, whimper & moan

When you think her

Most likely to retreat

She may

Ask too much information

Kiss before summation

Smile at castigation

But in the end

SHE will define Your Amazement

__________________________________________________________________

Be as strong as you pretend to be

__________________________________________________________________

Silence speaks in depths only heard by the soul of someone who cares enough to listen.

___________________________________________________________________

Easy come

Easy go

Those are distracted easily

Will never grow

___________________________________________________________________

If you

Are going to leave

I beg you

Do it quickly

___________________________________________________________________

His betrayal made her heart frail

__________________________________________________________________

Sometimes

I have a Fantasy

Where the ocean

Salty sweet sea

Is where I was meant to be

Ripped apart by the tides

Pushed against the shore of life

Warm to the touch

But the deeper you go

The more I turn cold

A never ending wave

Of total emotion

Swaying with the currents

__________________________________________________________________

Come to me

My sweet

Let us drink

Some wine

And speak of

Things divine

I’ll soothe your wounds

While you hold me tight

My heart

Will keep you warm at night

& together

Our feet will take flight

Allowing our troubles

To soar until out of sight

__________________________________________________________________

Engage her mind

Tease her dreams

Fill her until

She is bursting

At the seams

___________________________________________________________________

It is very simple

Don’t Tell Her

She is Enough

Prove it

She’ll Match

As much energy as

You dare to Give

Feed her the Truth

Her Love Will Be Proof

___________________________________________________________________

Quiet her doubts

Soothe her worries

Inside & out

Prove that you

Are true

Thru & thru

Then you may enjoy

All that she is

& More

___________________________________________________________________

I sat for an hour

In total awe

With tears streaming down

I remembered HER

Others wandered around

Wondering why

I was transfixed

On Sweet Gloriana

They have no thought

No clue how

This Southerner

From another world

Could appreciate or see

The strength of Her Majesty

___________________________________________________________________

All Words Are NOT Equal

__________________________________________________________________

At the peak

Of daybreak

She dances

In what’s left

Of the

Moons gloaming

Light

While the

Stars sparkle

One last time

It was HER time

To commune

With her world

__________________________________________________________________

Plain Face

Shy Smile

Quiet Demeanor

Until She’s Happy

Unnoticed & Unheard

Rarely Forceful or Bold

Easy Going with a Broken Mold

Never Was a Beauty

Fearful but Motivated

Cautious but Kind

And just wait until you see

That Soul is Simply

What Everyone Wants To Hold

__________________________________________________________________

Never worry

Dear One

You will be apprised

Of what is in my heart

If you Read my words

You’ll Feel how I’ve hurt

And never Fear

It’s not up to you

To help me Heal

____________________________________________________________________

Go ahead

I really don’t mind

Vilify me

Put me down

Speak your

Insidious words

Lash out

Against what

You don’t know

Tear me down

I promise you

I’ll get up again

Soil my name

I’ll keep

Coming back

Allow your jealousy

To speak

You’ll NEVER

Be like ME

____________________________________________________________________

Your hand around my throat

Your claws in my heart

Your boot deep in my stomach

Your ropes tied around my feet

But My Soul

You shall NEVER keep

_____________________________________________________________________

Lightning never strikes a heart twice

_____________________________________________________________________

She had searched

For her home

All over the globe

Here & there

She had heard the rumors

But something kept

Her feet moving

Yes, she had paused

Over there

A time or two

Thinking home was that

Until her heart fell flat

Then it was time

To Move On

____________________________________________________________________

She’s special in her own way

She’s walks at her own pace

It’s not in her

To be what the rest are

If you can’t see that

You’re flat out blind

____________________________________________________________________

It’s hard work

Getting behind her mask

But once you see

How beautiful her soul can be

You’ll wonder why

No one has before tried

To understand her

She’s all you ever dreamed of

And once lost

You’ll spend the rest of your life

Trying to recapture

What SHE was

_____________________________________________________________________

As the daylight dawns

The Sunday Sun warms

This cold bed that has haunted

The music flows

Against my soul

Reminding me always

I will walk alone

And I’ll be just fine

_____________________________________________________________________

Trust me when I say

Better men

Have tried to break me

They did not succeed

Cause I am

A stronger Breed

______________________________________________________________________

If you break my heart, I will mend.

And my soul will always be as good, as it has ever been.

______________________________________________________________________

Oh how I dream

Of the day when

Love rises above

The messy muck

When you can count

That someone will

Have your back

When you are down

Celebrate the good times

Wipe those tears away

When you cry

How I dream

Of what will never be

______________________________________________________________________

It was her routine

Waking early in the morn

Sippin her coffee

Sorting herself out

Riding herself of the nightmares

That dared to haunt

Praying today would be different

Than every day before

But she goes on & on

Pushing thru the pain

& dancing in the rain

_____________________________________________________________________

I’m Done

Running around

I’m Done

Searching for what I want

I’m Done

Chasing what ain’t for me

I’m Done

Waiting for you to get on board

I’m Done

Changing to please someone

I’m Done

Not speaking

I’m Done

Not being

Cause you didn’t want to see

ME

______________________________________________________________________

Engage my heart

Enjoy my mind

Take the good

And the bad

Either that resides

Be real & be true

And my soul

Will be All for You

_______________________________________________________________________

Real Love Never tells you that You Are Not Enough

_______________________________________________________________________

The Angel within me

Will forgive the misery

But

The Demon in me

Won’t let it slide

_____________________________________________________________________

If you open your eyes, the truth will no longer be blind.

_____________________________________________________________________

 

romance, Uncategorized

Sweet Little Musings April 2020

sweet little musings cover art wordpress

goodbye my love, goodbye

inside this hole in my heart I will hide

no more moon, no more sunlight

my soul is lost in fear & fright

I will weep for thee

& what could never be

until my last breath

my mind shall get no rest

my spirit shall fade

& my body will obey

I’ll dig my own grave

____________________________________

There’s a freedom that comes

when you give up on everything.

It’s when you realize

you’ve got nothing to gain

and nothing left to lose.

_______________________________________

There’s something very lonely

about writing poetry.

No one ever interprets the words

as you wrote them,

still,

they get a sense of something.

_________________________________________

Trust

So hard to build

So easy to break

____________________________________

Take me back

To that moment

When I had you

You pulled me through

When you cried in silence

& I swayed holding you

Take me back

To that time

When your heart

Was completely mine

When you filled

All of my sight

______________________________________

She was dazzling

Dancing in rain

A sweet lil smile

As she looked up

To the light

The storm was

Her strength

Her pain

Her defense

Her body

Encapsulating

The mysteries of life

_____________________________________

A tear is the most potent fear.

_____________________________________

It’s true

When in a suit

He is the most

Dapper dude

But it’s when

He’s curled into

You

He is the most

Handsome man

When his eyes gaze

Into yours

And clothes

Are the last thing

On your mind

____________________________________

My darling

My love

My girl

My life

I’ll be here

When you cry

I’ll be here

When you laugh

I’ll hold your hand

When you can’t stand

I’ll see you thru

When you’re lost in the dew

I’ll show you

When you can’t see the proof

You are my heart

_______________________________________

With the past

At her back

& a sword

Firmly in her grasp

Her loss

Had become

Her strength

Fighting her way

Out of the pits

Out of Hell

Made her

A heavyweight

She was now

More warrior

Than angel

________________________________________

Four thousand

Four hundred

Sixty five miles

Two planes

Only after a long drive

When her feet hit

The cold wind blew

She’d traveled the distance

The path of most resistance

To feel the heart

She’d been missing

__________________________________________

It had been

A mini vacation

Only a day or 2

But enough time

To renew our love

Embrace in silence

As the sun

Warmed our skin

We remembered why

We chose to stay

_______________________________________

In Sunday’s light

With you at my back

It’s the perfect way

To spend the day

Here in our silence

Bed sheets

Wrapped around us

No world outside

Just this time

Is for our life

And our existence

Is very bright

______________________________________

Be blunt

No reason now

For being tactful

Say what you want

& do it clearly

No gilding the lily

No reason to beat

Around the bush

Just beat out the bullshit

The time is now

You got something say

Do it

Don’t wait

Tomorrow might be too late

____________________________________

At the top of a mountain

With the sun on my face

I closed my eyes

& allowed my mind

To soar in flight

Cold wind whipping my skin

The world moving around me

It was only then

I decided to breathe freely

_________________________________________

Never worry

Never fear

The Grim Reaper

Will Always appear

Scratching souls of his list

Collecting those who are lost

Those who made deals with fate

When you least expect him

He’ll be there in the shadows

Sucking life out of your body

Ferrying u across the Dead Sea

_____________________________________________

As she stood still

Playing her sad melody

She begged the old heroes

Those made of the myths

Those who looked down

& for those who looked up

Her melody was a call to arms

Against what the world had done

Filled with emotions of a broken heart

Full of the need of hope

_________________________________________

Each time

It fell apart

Ripped on the edges

My old poor heart

Broken & shattered

Time after time

I welded new pieces on

One by lonely one

Sealed it with scars

Metal divots

Worked on it for hours

Year after year

Added more plates

To replace you

________________________________

Place your hand

In my mitten

I can feel your warmth

Even in this snow

Your smile conveys

In no uncertain terms

Your soul is mine

As you are the home

My heart has searched for

All this time

__________________________________

His presence was an assault

to my senses.

His laughter, his smile,

only made my heart go still.

I couldn’t take my eyes off him,

not even for one minute.

How did I go for so long

without this feeling.

_____________________________________

We are close

In our souls

Even when

We are far apart

We both know

The bonds that hold

Are fragile but strong

The connection made

Live on their own

i kneel to show respect

Your control gives it back

There is no You without me

2 sides of 1 coin

We’ll forever be

___________________________________

Stop me from breathing

Cease my mind thinking

Make me beg & plead

Giving in only

When I have done my most

Give me your bruises

Make me your muse

Inspire me

To inspire your ire

Teach me what I need to know

Allow me to let go

___________________________________

Words that follow the notes

Disappear into the unknown

Flashing dissonance captures her throat

But she holds resolve to go forth

She is but an audience of 1

It’s her pride that mustn’t be forlorn

Heaven may watch with a tearful eye

But it’s Hell that laughs & cries

_____________________________________

She plays it sexy

Cool & aloof

She’s her own woman

Of that

She can prove

Has no need

For a weak man

To feed

Knows what works

Certain of what won’t

Has more patience

Then there are days

Unable to settle

For anything less

Than what she deserves

& foregoes the rest

_________________________________________

Teasing

Tempting

Shivers of relenting

Tasting

Thrusting

Boldly spectacular spacing

Tainted

Taunted

Souls clinging on haunted

Tempted

Treasured

Moments go unfettered

_____________________________________________

Days when you cant get out of bed

Smiles that hide the pain that spreads

Darkness in a day filled with sun

Never speaking up to anyone

Dusty path on a walk alone

No where for your heart to call home

No rest when you lay your head down

THATS How It Is

With depression you dare to live

_________________________________________

The difference

Between you & me

Is what I see

A world filled

Colorful grays

& pain spilled

Vivid blue rain

Reds covering disdain

Greens filling the sea

Oranges that fall then peak

Yellows that cling

Like lavender in spring

Words that leave their mark

Hearts falling apart

________________________________________

The myth is

That they will accept you

For who you are

The promise is

That they will leave you off

Better than who you were

_____________________________________

you’ll not go hungry for fear

you’ll fall&still persevere

you’ll love hard&deep

you’ll be torn&weep

you’ll be braver than some knights

you’ll crave darkness’s delights

you’ll cry wanting to be loved

you’ll pray for death to heaven above

Then fate will whisper

You are one of us dear sister

_________________________________________

Wave after wave

My body is further enslaved

Between the sea & storm

This watery grave will be my new norm

My soul will swim with the fishes

My laughter will fade with the crests wishes

Sharks will nibble at my nose

While the mermaids are jealous of my toes

_____________________________________________

Fighting the storm

Weary as they may be

No time to make it home

For the waves will collapse thee

Barely any sun

To shine on the way out of this dark

No battle shall be won

To the sea we will be lost

____________________________________________

Grace my lips

With one of those kisses

That make my heart ache

Cause my body to shiver & shake

Taste of me

And all those sweet reveries

Waste no time now

As our bodies fall to the ground

____________________________________________

My devotion

Is not made for

Men of weak emotion

______________________________________________

I’ll break your heart

She whispered

After much thought

It was a warning

She’d often said

To the likes of

Such weak men

Worry not

As I let down the gate

You’ll forever reside

My soul has no escape

________________________________________________

Tis not the beginning or the end

That proves the worth of your being

It is the messy middle that shows you

What you are meant to do

And enlightens your truth

_______________________________________________

Placed in a folder

Marked Do Not Ever Open

Memories of a lost love

A heartbreak still tender

To the touch

Pictures & words

Never again to be read

Or felt

The evidence may be hidden

But the pain

Will never be forgiven

________________________________________________

It is only my strength

That allows me to fit

In this small box

That wasn’t meant

For all my love

_________________________________________

The weak shall always fall

Only the strong

Shall stand up again tall

__________________________________________

I should’ve be born

In another time

In another place

Because all I hold dear

Is at a loss in this space

__________________________________________

in all the strange places

my soul dares to hide

there’s always something within me

that longs to fly high

my heart is only a secret

that grows larger with time

it beats hard within my chest

it gives my words their rhyme

my mind is the audience

watching life go by

_______________________________________

I love you so much

I can’t breathe,

but I know

in my soul

that you’re

just no good

for me.

______________________________________

Hidden in the reflection

Of my darkest dream inception

A piano plays somber

Nocturnes that meander

Into lullabies on a canvas

The dense fog of these

Blocks all my senses

& gives no ease

It is but a drawn out tease

Of a world filled with pleas

_______________________________________

It was never truly mine

but still hurt once gone

______________________________________

Hidden in the Scottish mist

The midnight moon wanes

& shallow graves persist

Releasing their dead

From whence they came

To walk the earth

In immortal shame

_________________________________

Charon waits for thee

Near the coast

So the Cimmerian can see

He waits for not one of you

But he waits for you all

Eager to ferry your souls to Hades

And don’t forget the gold you must pay

______________________________________

dragonfly dreams

magical mysteries

unrealistic realms

fantasies forlorned

spacey scientific things

humans that become other beings

love & loss

tears shed & anger crossed

knights, queens, faeries & dust

all hidden in these pages

imagination is never lost

_______________________________________

No one knows

From where I’ve come

Where I’m headed

What path I’ve tread

No one sees

Pain that lives within me

Sorrow that captures my tears

How I’ve survived all these years

No one can tell

Whether I live in Heaven or Hell

Scars are fresh or healed

How I manage to breathe

_____________________________________

I love you

But

I want you

But

I need you

But

I feel you

But

I shouldn’t

But

I wouldn’t

But

I couldn’t

But

I won’t and you don’t

__________________________________

Our time was short

So many emotions to sort

And when the world exploded

I was left with all the things I’d never known

_____________________________________

Lay the foundation strong

Build those walls tall

Fill it up

With those things that

Make you happy

Make you calm

Bring you peace

Forge your home

With all the things you know

Will protect you from the cold world

There will be wolves at the door before you know it

______________________________________________

Her obvious loss

was bloody evidence

to every one else.

____________________________________________

Take a step outside

See the sunrise

Listen to the birds chirp

Watch the green grass grow

This earth that we call home

Is a majestic being all on its own

So take a moment

From your daily lives

See the world

From the inside

Sigh

Then smile

______________________________________________

The river was wide

And the shore was wet

But only I could witness it’s depth

To everyone else it was a serene calm being

But for me, it was the watery grave I’d always seen

________________________________________________

no response

was heard

my heart fell

& a tear rolled

all this was over

without a word

another corpse

on the pile

of what was

_________________________________________

oh let me be

that grey tree

with no leaves

allow my roots

to dig in deep

and my branches

with the wind swing

let me portray

the darkness of a heart

never attached to another

always set far apart

may sunlight never fall upon

else the bark would fail to hold on

__________________________________________

when starting over

on a scorned canvas

one must look

for the blank space

try to imagine

where the empty was traced

try to inhabit

the oils upon its face

try to contain

the feelings it embraces

while leaking your heart

onto the porous space

________________________________________

the moon was flanked by the clouds

along the sky they did ride

no sound in the world except for the owls

hooting at the moon from their home in the wild

the perfect pair they did make

all life was asleep until the sun would wake

___________________________________________

Broken into a million pieces

Scars hid the forbidden spaces

Shattered & bleeding

So far from healing

Pain is the only feeling

________________________________________

All those long lost fables

Has made my mind unstable

__________________________________________

Such political brutality

Pitting each of us

Against one another

Fighting on key issues

The lying & excuses

All for greed

Money & power

Whichever it would be

The System isn’t flawless

But those who participate

Keeping making it worse

________________________________________

Unconditional love

Is what we all search for

So hard to find

Cause it hides within our mind

We always look to others

To verify the worth of us

If we only could realize

Living by what they think

Will be our deadly demise

_________________________________________

When I look inside

In the deepest dark night

When I have no more strength to fight

Thru the bloodiest of times

That’s when I turn the music up loud

And that’s where I find the power to keep going

__________________________________________

my mind was so intrigued

as those ruby red lips appeared

the music flowed slow

as the lips sung each note

not a moment after it had begun

i smiled&along i sang

dreamin of that science fiction

double feature

poor Brad&Janet

oh that sweet creature

& that Mad Frankenfurter

_________________________________________

The world came crashing down so fast

I searched high & low for a friend

Someone to share this last bit of time

Someone to hold on to

Someone to look at & smile

Someone to share a pint with

While we said goodbye to this life

_________________________________________

Tears filled my eyes

My mind was dizzy inside

This stranger who came from nowhere

Had seen through me more than anyone

___________________________________________

I begged him to stay

He told me to pray

But here I sit

Just another day

Still lost

Unable to choose my own way

_____________________________________________

In my tiny box

Living & breathing

Ceiling tiles filled with hope

The walls were tattered&torn

Filled with plaster

In places unseen & unknown

I had picked apart the floor long ago

Raged against my cell

Fought the binds of Hell

Yet here I sit

Locked in a box

That never fit

____________________________________________

as the bombs fell

into chaos

the world was held

corpses & half dead

laid on the ground

screaming out in dread

the old gypsy fortune teller

stepped outside

to walk amongst

what was shattered

her smile told it all

she had foreseen

this world’s fall

_________________________________________

My silence acquiesced.

My heart was not at its best.

______________________________________

It wasn’t the sting of the belt

that soothed me,

but rather this kinship,

this duality

that was bathed in honesty.

_____________________________________

there was something ferly in the air

an anxious static in the atmosphere

masked faces & worried eyes

surrounded what used to be my life

they used to be humans

but now they are frightened islands

distancing themselves out of fear for their health

coveting the world in disrepair

_____________________________________________

the revenant haunted me

remnants of what could be

revulsions of those things

the specter held my heart hostage

the memories wouldn’t release me

I was lost in the time that wouldn’t be

my soul was finally buried

with all those things left untold

________________________________________________

The struggle for acceptance was all too real.

Would he still want me even though I wasn’t healed?

Could my heart take another chance?

Would lightning strike twice?

Could I forego the past & all I know?

Would the dream meet reality’s ghost?

Could I make a choice?

_______________________________________________

It was a mystery

Even to me

What did I look for

How was I to see

No faint light to follow

Only pain & anger to swallow

I looked to the left, then the right

I looked backwards & forwards

I was alone & yet

Still not free

___________________________________________

My head said 1 thing

My heart said another

Stuck in the indecisive turmoil

I stood at the fork in the road

With no friends, no love to help

Unable to move, barely able to breathe

Unsheltered from the rain that poured down

I could find no peace

____________________________________________

I was just a little girl

Dreaming of the great wide world

When I tore my own heart out

Put it somewhere I could carry it

I didn’t know the hole would keep bleeding

Staining everyone around me

But it can’t go back to whence it came

I’ll just let the balloon take me away

________________________________________

you disappeared

from my atmosphere

gone like the wind

just a storm that moved on

no goodbyes

no more hellos

walked away & went forth

on to trash another soul

mine was broken enough

no morals, no guilt

no support for my tears

you only validated all my fears

___________________________________________

We are made

Of stone & mud

Fractured flesh

Frenzied facts

Sullied mess

Sinful sacrifices

Dutiful doubters

Deranged doers

Stone hearts

Muddy thoughts

We are not our souls

We are not our loss

We are broken puzzles

Of what wasn’t

__________________________________________

Was it my path

Or my choices

That lead me here

My feet skating along

The edge of the sea

Broken wood behind me

Mimicking pieces of

What my heart would be

Sunlight fading to dim

Seagulls flying

Death calls to me

Lapping tides & the breeze

Techni-colored sadness

Always seeps

____________________________________________

The wind blows

Away my sadness

Giving chase

To my ghosts

I close my eyes

To all I’ve known

Allowing the notes

To dictate my mood

Living in blues

Cannot escape this world

That’s become subdued

No sun today

Just memories

That forever stay

______________________________________________

The dead sing no songs

The living never forget the tones

Those souls in between

Know of both meanings

________________________________________

If you wait

Just long enough

Read enough of my soul

You’ll shed a tear

& feel the beat

Of a broken heart

That dares to seep

Scars that never cease

Bleeding on the page

Ghosts inside that creep

They fill the chapters written

They act out whats hidden

Sing the songs of the unforgiven

___________________________________________

No words

No fight left

No one heard

Nails are broken

From clawing my way up

Strength is gone

‘Bout ready to give up

No one there to help me

I’ll slip away so easily

Just me & my baggage

To surround my sadness

__________________________________________

Sadness is not

Always blue & black

Its the oranges &

Blood red smudges

Its the paleness

Of a face

Its the purple haze

Of eyes in disgrace

Its the greens

Of hope that’s died

Tainted sky blues

Darkness with no light

Light that fades with sight

Sadness is not

What you think

It lives in you & me

___________________________________________

She waits

For her lonely fate

Hoping & wishing

For some unknown vision

Somewhere to go

Somewhere to fit in

Some life she knows

She’ll never get

So she waits for it

For the clock to chime in

For her heart to forgive

Alone but she waits

For a chance she’ll never take

____________________________________________

Give me reds

The oranges & blues

Give me the white caps

On the shore they flow

Give me a sunset

& a sweet sunrise

Give me the sound

Taste that abounds

Give me serenity

& watery graves aplenty

Give me peace

Tears of sweet release

Give me this heaven

Swallow me in this hell

I beg thee

______________________________________________

I close my eyes

To the cruelness

Of this world

To the actions

To the words

That wound a mortal

To the bone

I close my eyes

& I do see

A world only meant

For me

It is only there

Will I truly see

_______________________________________

There is strength

Hidden in my tears

There was a life

I’ve lived with no fears

There was a time

I was harder than nails

With weakness

No one could find

But now

I stand against the rain

I feel no pain

I harvest no love

For I know now

That I am No One

____________________________________________

let me

dear life

be like a bird

& fly

let me soar

replace all these scars

let my breath be

shallow & quick

so that my body

be released

let me touch the sun

with black wings

full of mud

let me see another day

from the heavens

where I wish to stay

let me dear life

finally be free

______________________________________

Looking out

Into the unknown

No one treads this path

That I’ve chosen

No one feels as I do

Were my skies ever blue

When did the sand

Beneath my feet

Help me stand

When did my tears

Ever heal my pain

Still I wake

I walk

Still I stand

Never remembering

That I can talk

_____________________________________

Light soothes

The darkness

Tears flow

With unwavering

Sadness

When the world is blue

There’s nothing left to do

But give into the madness

Wash away the clouds

Breach a new hold

On the craziness that unfolds

Remember though

You are always

Alone

_______________________________________

Those who are there

When the rains pour down

Those who wipe your tears

Hug you until you no longer frown

Those who listen night or day

Feel your pain & still stay

Those who see your beautiful soul

When you cant see at all

Those who love you

When you don’t love yourself

Ones who drag you back from hell

_________________________________________

walking alone

thru the rain

& the snows

walking from

out of the shadows

heading for some light

away from her

natural state of fright

her body numb

from all that’s happened

her heart broken

from all these extractions

let the time pass

the death of her heart

will lead to springs grass

_________________________________________

She had held him

Through eternity

When the rains came

When the snows fell

She had held him

Until she had grown

Limbs weaved into his own

To hold him forever

Their love to never

Go unknown

She’d hold his bones

Lie there

Nose to nose

Attached to his memory

Soul to soul

___________________________________

watercolor mysteries

fanciful dancing majesties

lost in time

lost in movement & rhyme

alone against a sea of dull tones

faded blue canvas

enlightened only by nothingness

______________________________________

With every tear I cried

Another piece of my heart died

While my soul screamed why

My body begged for me to try

Sleep always passed the time

But when awake

My mind told me lies

Tried to convince me

I was worth something

Tried to tell me

I was worth loving

All along I knew I wasn’t

__________________________________________

The path is dark

And full of potholes

But I’ll carry my baggage

As far as I can go

______________________________________

No body

No face

Just a memory

Of a lost shape

Someone who

Never was

Something she’d

Only dream of

Comfort from the stars

1s that shined

Only in her heart

Holding a dream

That will never be

Wishing it could

Hold her steady

But she’ll wake

Soon enough

Knowing her soul

Will be alone

_____________________________________

2 sides

1 love

Her from heaven

He from down below

Their 1 chance at true love

Separated by happenstance of birth

Both dark of heart

Both strangled by lives

That keep them apart

Neither would sacrifice

Their wings their place

In this life

Their love

Would never be enough

______________________________________

Show me the stars

The galaxies

That dare to shine

But be so far

Point out the constellations

From this peak

Tell me their stories

Tell me their trials

For this 1 night

Promise me

What we could be

& when daylight strikes

Our future will disappear

Into the sea

_____________________________________

It’s all gone

Now

My heart holds

No more songs

My chest inflates

But my soul

Is no longer

Empty shell

That still knows

How to hurt so well

Desert of a mind

That still keeps time

This life

Shall never be mine

____________________________________

I cuddle against

The memory of you

Knowing there is no chance

You’ll ever again

Be in my view

Your presence

Will be a mystery

Forever in my mind

My love for what

Never was

I will hold

Until my last breath

____________________________________

I expected too much

Never asking

What this really was

I wanted it all

Knowing 1 day

Off the cliff I’d fall

I’ll not take you with me

I’ll leave you now

To be free

Twas not your dreams

Twas not your fantasy

You take your path

I’ll take my street

Never shall the to

Ever meet

______________________________________

It was never

Your fault

The blame

Lies with me

As it should

Cause I knew

It could never be

All these hopes & dreams

Were only manifested

Fantasies

You had no part

It was the failings

Of my broken heart

Go on knowing

This was all my fault

______________________________________

We agreed

This could never be

It was just that one moment

When time froze

But that is gone

Now we must move on

& live with this knowledge

US is something

We’ll never know

_________________________________

When the world is crazy

When there’s no hope left

Cuddle me in close

Help heal my breath

Let our souls

Soothe our wounds

Allow our love

To culminate

In a long lasting hug

______________________________

No fresh breath

For those lost

Beneath the water

No more time

Left for those

Who gave up trying

No more love

For those who

Can’t bare to forgive

No more life

Left in those

Who don’t feel it

_____________________________________

Caring for someone doesn’t always equate to love.

Caring can be an obligation.

Love is always a revelation.

________________________________________

Bravery is doing

what needs to be done,

no matter how much it

hurts you inside.

Cowardice is being complacent with life,

never growing, never exploring all those things

that you hide.

___________________________________________

Let us

You & me

Fly along these clouds

Then down to the sea

Lets go up to the heavens

Then take a peek

On this earth below us

Let us go see

Ride the winds

Sit upon the breeze

Feel this earth

While it lives & breathes

Dive into the ocean

Swim with the fishes

Then lets talk

Of dreams & wishes

___________________________________

The paths on her face

Had lead her to this space

The rivers that flowed

From the pain of knowing

Each flaw each scar

Emblazoned deep into her heart

Showed through each mark

Stormy clouds had filled her life

She rarely ever saw the sun shine

This was her life

___________________________________

All the pieces had been maneuvered

to surround the Queen.

Each piece had played its part,

that She had always seen.

None matched Her grace,

Her wit, or Her skill.

Not even the King

would ever get His fill.

____________________________________

Shake off that disdain

Which gives you so much pain

Ignore what others say

They are lost & have yet to find their way

Be true to yourself

Keep your heart full of health

Follow your own path in this world

No one else knows

Where you need to go

______________________________________

Wishes & dreams

Of fairy tales

That will never be

Pixie dust & moonbeams

Let us sleep

So peacefully

Soft beds & warm covers

Tuck us into

A blissful state

Let our slumber

Be more fun(er)

Than our reality

___________________________________

Frown lines around her lips

matched the ones on her forehead.

Her knee bounced & shook against

the flimsy hospital chair where she sat.

Watching the door as people passed through

while she hoped for good news to come into her view.

______________________________________________

One day we’ll be able

To live in this far fetched fable

So sure of the outcome

Never bitten by any bugs

Never a rain storm up above

Only sunshine coming down with love

__________________________________________________

Don’t be so

Obtuse in your speech

When words are formed

Get them out quickly

Don’t assume that

I’m too thick to receive

The delicate subtleties

You dare to weave

Don’t think I won’t

Beat you to the punch

Figure out your game

Then hit a home run

Leaving you in the dust

_____________________________________________

Note by note

Plucking the strings

Music is the ghost

Dancing against the wind

Breathing in with each chord

Racing time in every long or short

Echoes of madness

Trickles of sadness

Each note filled to the rim

Until the end

When it bursts at the seams

__________________________________________

I miss…

mundane-ness of routines

hugs I used to get

laughter among close friends

unmasked smiles from strangers on the street

chatting in line while u wait

music playing to fill up empty space

sweets from my favorite bakery

the love that made me what I am

__________________________________________

scribbled in ink

words of magic

lines filled with belief

some silly paper dreams

dusted with hope

& a little doubt in between

from the mind came these things

through the hand they are written

into the universe who is never smitten

this space is for the unforgiven

____________________________________________

reach out for me

when you’re drowning

in the deep dark sea

don’t worry for the light above

tis only the heavens

that want to destroy us

only focus on my hands

within your grasp & demand

our souls will swim & blend

our hearts will beat & then mend

____________________________________________

He stopped at the midpoint

Between her sweet lips

& her heaving breasts

He was lost in her scent

Her gazed focused elsewhere

Until his hand slipped up her dress

To tease with a gentle caress

& then he had her full attention

She searched his face to gauge his intention

__________________________________________

Bruised bloodied

Beaten & battered

The thick sting of pain

Was all that mattered

The night claimed by rain

Only moon & stars remained

Crawling from this world into another

Morphing from a victim into a lover

___________________________________________

His hands on my waist

Lead to a pause not haste

His lips so close to mine

Seconds no longer made up time

My body strained against the cloth

He pushed further & the past was forgot

Fires that burned deep within

All that was left in this space was lust & sin

_______________________________________________

what if the one i really loved

is lost now in heaven up above

will they wait at the gate

when it is my time to go

or will they have forgotten

this love that was lost long ago

___________________________________________

i say these words

never to make you cry

it’s only to allow my heart

to release a heavy sigh

__________________________________________

clearly you’ve found someone new

because my true self was never in your view

____________________________________________

the sun & the breeze

makes my heart at ease

it’s the night & the moon

that makes my soul cringe

& my body ache to spoon

at daybreak i feel most awake

my mind is clear & hopeful

& i say goodbye to my ghosts

but at dusk the air turns to dust

& my scars begin to rust

___________________________________________

When I said that I loved you

I meant every damn word

When you said I wasn’t enough

I wondered what I did wrong

When you said it just wasn’t meant to be

I became a lonely wave crushed by your sea

When you said that you would never look back

I fell to my knees & prayed this heart wouldn’t crack

_______________________________________________

Fear made you walk away

Fear is why I’m gone to stay

Fear is what holds you deep in the night

Fear makes tears fall from my eyes

Fear is the excuse you use

Fear gives me strength to make necessary moves

______________________________________________

Monachopsis

Why am I in the sunlight

How is my voice echoing

From this stage to take flight

When did my tail morph into feet

Where are my taste buds

All is bland when I eat

I know there’s a tightrope

By the wobble under my toes

I know I don’t belong here

Where did my heart go

____________________________________________________

“I love the way your mind works”

He said with a smile

“If only your heart loved

Then this could stand the test of time”

And with that

A tear fell with a sigh

“If only you could see

How many times my heart has died”

We both walked away

Never saying goodbye

_______________________________________________

It wasn’t the beginning

But the end was in sight

We had come to a fork in the road

Otherwise known as the midpoint

Still time to turn back

Or push forth in our quest

Her heart wanted to keep going

And that was her only request

__________________________________________

He reached for my waist

& tugged on the thick fabric.

Our eyes met &

my heart leaped with the magic.

He was waiting for

some kind of confirmation

to spill from my lips,

but instead my eyes blinked

with a nod of my head.

_________________________________________

A heart can’t be taxed

Because love broke it all too fast

A soul can’t be rotten

Because pain has been forgotten

A body can’t withstand so much pain

Because it trusted the wrong person in vain

A mind can’t repair itself

Because life stole its health

__________________________________________

Just a snippet of my heart before I fall apart.

__________________________________________

Poetry is a song of the soul

Transcribed for others

So they can feel & know

It flows to a rhythm

The mind keeps the time

The heart pushes it forward

When the soul wants to rewind

Poetry doesn’t have to rhyme

But when the words flow

It can make you feel divine

____________________________________________

I hunted high & low

Took too many paths

I didn’t know where to go

Looked underneath sheets

In closets & curtains

Search the depths of Hell

& burned my wings

Soared up to the sky

Only to be told

To give up my flight

Alone & back on the ground

I realize Love can’t be found

__________________________________________

Steady your heart beat

Be still your body

This is not the time to weep

The war is coming

Can you hear the stampede

No way out now

Ready your sword

Plant your feet

Death comes with a crowd

But it’ll be me & you

It’ll have to beat

__________________________________________

The road we chose

Leads from the cradle

To the grave

Sometimes full of potholes

More times merely dips & shallows

It twists & turns

Either a culdasac or a ledge

Most times it is a 1 way

Better to move forward

Than back track to another day

___________________________________________

Time is only liquid

Winding in & out

Flowing slowly down the creek

Kinetic chaos moving without speed

Going where it wishes

No concern about our worry

Never stopping for our tears

Having no care about lost love

Time is our enemy

Although it pretends to be a friend

______________________________________________

Tired of being hurt

Trusting the wrong ones

Tired of being alone

Like I’m the only 1

Tired of waking

From the nightmare of life

Tired of crying

From this long lost strife

Tired of doing what I can

To make it through the night

Tired of being confused

Not knowing what’s right

_______________________________________________

Reality has no spark

If you wish me

To breathe

Then feed me art

Let the oils

Etch love into my heart

Allow the colors

To wash the pain away

From my soul

Show me things

I’ll never personally know

Create a world

That’s beyond BOLD

____________________________________________

As my days

Get shorter in length

Memories overwhelm

Reality’s strength

My time is better filled

With the pieces left instilled

Rather than face what is now

Which only causes tears & frowns

_____________________________________________

He spoke with a charm

that had my heart

setting off alarms.

Melodic tones

fell from his lips

as though he were reading

an imaginary script.

My body wished to react

but thankfully my brain cells

were intact.

He finished his sleazy complimentary slew,

and I happily withdrew.

___________________________________________________

Let me

Be the One

Let me race

Around the Sun

Let me

Take these scars

Let me

Carry you just because

Let me

Block the stings & arrows

Let me

Rescue your heart from the shadows

Let me

Wipe the tears from your face

Let me

Be the hug you embrace

Let me

Be the One

____________________________________________

No more hello’s

No more good night’s

No more see ya soon’s

This life has to take flight

No more wishing on stars

No more battle scars

No more music & applause

The lights in your eyes

Have grown dim

With your breath’s pause

________________________________________________

Better Together

I hear them whisper

From inside my head

You can’t believe

What you see

Convincing my eyes

Not believe what I read

Only listen

To the voices screaming

Bloody murder

In my dreams

Reality is

A fantasy

When your mind is only

Deemed a malady

____________________________________________

it was all my fault

….

i believed you

when you talked

______________________________________________

Hold me tightly

Don’t dare let go

Tonight we are

More than flesh

More than 2 hearts

Together we are

More than our souls

Breathe into me

I’ll lean on you

The world will cease

Our minds will find

Some kind of peace

You in me

Me with you

Nothing will harm

Us 2

______________________________________________

Welcome to the world

Welcome to our Hell

We are all

Somewhat damaged

Although

Some may heal

After much pain

Wounds will scar

Leaving proof

Our demons may live

Even when we cease

To breathe

But while you are here

Damaged or healed

Try to LIVE

______________________________________________

It had been

A cruel campaign

Work hard enough

For her to love you

Vanish when it rains

Earn enough trust

She gives you no doubts

Then crush all it of

With 1 line of lies

Twist tease tempt her mind

To follow you

Not reality’s design

Then burn her to the ground

Stomp the ash as you fly

_________________________________________________

Touch me

Tenderly

Steal the taste

From my mouth

Linger

Leisurely

Send a chill

Down my spine

Wait

Wantonly

Hear my

Sweet pleas

Dainty

Dauntingly

Order me

To my knees

_________________________________________________

With that 1 kiss

They faded away

In deep bliss

Felt down in

The marrow below

Their skin

Her focus was him

His lust burst from sin

Caught in this moment of

Unadulterated surprise

No one was more alive

Than the 2 this describes

___________________________________________________

Pull me

Deeper into you

Hold my soul tight

So that

I will never lose my view

Cradle my insecurities

Help me

Believe this to be true

If only in this

1 moment

The world is no longer in view

__________________________________________________

With that 1 action

My body reacted

With that 1 tug

My leash reminded me of

Where I belonged

Where my heart soared

With that 1 word

I knew my place in this world

With that 1 kiss

I knew what I always missed

____________________________________________________

Give my heart compassion

Hold me in your arms forever

Make my tender heart love

Prove it to my body with your touch

Let us truly become one

Kiss me now

Let my soul not struggle to find

Where my heart has always blind

I am yours

& you are mine

________________________________________________

We are not connected

By the punishment you give me

We are not connected

By the leash that holds me near

We are not connected

By your Dominance & my submission

We are connected

Because without me

You couldn’t exist

__________________________________________________

Compel me

To kneel

Earn my trust

To expound my lust

Teach my body to feel

While my mind comes to heel

Exact such sweet pain

That I have no choice but

To return again & again

Compel me

Teach me

Feed me

Then

Unleash me

________________________________________________

We go up hills

Survey the world

Look upon fields

When we go down

We need not do so

With a frown

Life is filled with these things

That bring us up

To the tip of emotions

Only to allow us the drop

To remind us

What we forgot

Every night

Must have a day

Life will have its way

_________________________________________________

When it comes to matters of the heart,

let us not be childish

& tear what we had completely apart.

Let us be adults

& admit what once was.

Allow ourselves

to let go of the past.

Go our separate ways

only wishing for the best.

Don’t be foolish

& carry that hatred.

________________________________________________

Take the essence

Of your soul

Slice it open

For those you trust

For those you know

Bare the darkest parts

Knowing

Only light can bring them

From the dark

Hug those you love

Kiss those you miss

Most of all

Create your own story

Rewrite it

Until it fits

_________________________________________________

What’s your limit

A broken heart

Or a destitute spirit

What’s the end game

Tears to be shed

Or the bright lights of fame

What’s the story line

Girl corrupts boy

Or hearts shattered to a rhyme

What’s the moral

Do you give in or give up

Or

Do you keep coming back for more

___________________________________________________

It was the classic tale

Girls meets boy

Boy scars girl

Then bails

Tears get shed

Words get said

Hearts get cracked

Minds never look back

Time keeps the beat

Wounds mend

Hearts forget

The soul splits

Tears always flow

Again & again

___________________________________________________

She held her grace

Even as her skin burned

With a raging blaze

Anger filled her soul

But no one would ever know

She was adept at

Controlling the storm within

She was a lady

But soon the day would come

Her pain would be written in blood

_____________________________________________________

Her heart

Taught him to breathe

Her words

Gave him such reprieve

Her actions

Proved to be his distraction

Her soul

Was what captured him whole

Her compassion

Would never be out of fashion

So he kissed her lips

Fulfilling all they had wished

_____________________________________________________

Sounds from her mouth

Softness in her back

Compelled him to act

Sliding a hand around her waist

He bent to place a sweet kiss

The smell of her skin

Is what did him in

He could never live again

Without this kind of sin

____________________________________________________

Connected by a touch

Something more than just lust

Tender fingertips

Sweet kissed lips

Meaningful sighs

Slippery thighs

1 moment in time

2 hearts sublime

___________________________________________________

From the center of my core

My instincts screamed

Until they were sore

It told me not to

Trust the words you’d said

It told me to hold back

Don’t push ahead

But my heart had other plans

Now it’s gotten us all into this shit

My mind is the only sane 1 left

_____________________________________________________

In the midst of a storm

I realized my life was not the norm

My ideas &my heart

Weren’t the same as others had thought

Others hid from sorrow & pain

I grew stronger each day I remained

My tears weren’t weakness leaking from my soul

They were a shield my heart is the sword

______________________________________________________

Be still my beating heart

In this moment let time stop

Let the colors wash away what was

May the sun shine down rays of love

Allow my lungs to fill with untainted air

Give my fingers permission to touch what’s bare

Unblind my eyes so that I may see

In this moment let me be

_____________________________________________________

That squealing giggle

Before he learned to talk

That delightful sniggle

When he learned to walk

That high pitched loud noise

When playing with his toys

Only the laughter of my child

Could bring me that kind of joy

___________________________________________________

My heart melted against his

When I stepped into his embrace

Nowhere else in the world

Would ever feel like this

There was no other safe space

Than when I was in his

___________________________________________________

Regret fueled my tears

Backed up with fear

From so many years

I had placed my trust carelessly

Into the hands of someone who simply

Couldn’t handle the sorrows of my reality

But instead treated me like plain anatomy

____________________________________________________

In the midst of indecision

Anger struck me to the core

With a heart as weak as mine was

There was no way to settle the score

No magic wands or memory erasing potions

I’d have to suffer through

It was my strength that I had to prove

______________________________________________________

Don’t be a fool

Don’t trust ’em like you do

Don’t accept the lies

Don’t let ’em make you cry

Don’t take the little that’s given

Don’t worry about what you’re missing

Don’t lose the hope you have

Don’t fade away with your past

Don’t let your heart grow cold

Don’t forget your soul knows

_________________________________________________

Uncategorized

I’m Sorry

I’m sorry your heart gets broken

Time and time again

I’m sorry you’re only a token

In the games people decide to play

I’m sorry you feel all alone

Lost with no hand to hold

I’m sorry your tears keep flowing

Hidden in the shadows

With no one knowing

I’m sorry you have no words to speak

With no love, no hugs,

I know life looks bleak

I’m sorry you’re not strong

As you were before

But you’re the only one left

Who can lift your heart up

Drag yourself from the depths

Stand tall and scream

“C’mon life!

What’s next?”

Uncategorized

Sweet Little Musings March 2020

sweet little musings cover art wordpress

Can you feel it?

Can you name it?

Where does it hide at night?

Does anything still beat within?

Or are you hollow inside?

Do your eyes see the truth anymore?

Or is your mind blind to your sight?

Can you tell if your soul is gone?

Did you watch it take flight?

__________________________________

Distance between us

See how it grows

You sleep on one side

& over my body rolls

Sad silent distance

Feel how it stings

Our hearts once beat together

Now each struggles to breathe

The miles nay eons

They stretch all the way

Until it goes unseen

& forever is gone to stay

_____________________________________

Welcome one Welcome all

Come feast your eyes on this

You’ll laugh & then smile

It’s a promise I make

Watch the silly dancer

Spin & spin

Locked in a rhythm of monotony

It’s the way she lives

Never ending circles

She smiles then frets

Only to be caged here

Deep in her sorrow & regret

______________________________________

You beg for dear mercy

I have none left to give

For if the world showed courtesy

It’d give a kiss before it slit my wrists

Only anger & violence

You see it feeds the distaste

Of a world built on greed & gluttony

Castles in bloody sand do they live

____________________________________________

Misery loves company

Says the world today

My misery loves a party

Come to my pit

& let’s play

Dress in all black

Wear a skirt

Or a hat

Some silky pantyhose

Or fishnets for a pose

Drink the pain in

Live here in my sin

Don’t fret for tomorrow

My love thrives in sorrow

________________________________________

A dutiful wife she was

Soothing & caring for him

Whether he was sick or not

Tended to his emotional wounds

Giving all she could

He took it for granted

Expected everything she had

Abused her when she needed love

Until she was a memory

Gone to live above

__________________________________________

Never have I ever

Given pity or taken pleasure

In the depths of someone’s hunger

For life or pursuit of a lover

Never have I ever

Cast aside someone I treasure

Turned away a love for someone better

Used one to replace another

Never have I ever

Fed on someone who was my lesser

Taken advantage or given pressure

Believing I knew what was better

Never have I ever

Stolen or used another’s possession

A heart or soul that wasn’t freely given

Only to be labeled someone’s mistress

Never will I ever

Trust my love to mindless missives

Give my soul to someone who’s dismissed it

Traded my heart for fake intentions

Never will I ever

Regret all the things I’ve missed

Wish I hadn’t done the things I did

Forget the love that broke my spirit

__________________________________________________

We are not just body parts

People are not just what they show us

But a mass of complicated outcomes

If we could only see one another for that

Then the hunt for a match

Would not be such a terrible task

_________________________________________

left without a care

tossed in the bin

no way to repair

pieces upon pieces

shards of

a scattered masterpiece

her heart left

no longer to beat

her body a shell

left in the dark to weep

her soul splintered

no longer to sleep

who could imagine

her love would be so cheap

_________________________________________

Once settled in their world

It took 1 second for it to unfurl

With words spoken in haste

Their love immediately changed

Truth had been spilt like their blood

There hearts no longer filled with kind love

It altered the path they had walked on

Instead creating a fork in the road

________________________________________

In the post

She held her hope

Each day waiting impatiently

Words from her lover

Reply saying he’d stay

As time lapse

Days & long nights

No delivery did come

Which left her sunk in the mud

He was gone

Sadness filled her songs

Until the emotion

Cease to course through her blood

________________________________________

The script

Had been flipped

He was the beauty

& she the beast

His heart

She’d hoped to see

Her beauty

In it he did believe

Still a match

Made with fairy tale facts

Roles were reversed

But the love

Did quench their thirst

_________________________________________

When we were children

We did crawl

Amazed at the wonder

Of this great big world

When a know it all teen

We laugh ignoring our seams

Pushing against our edges

Always seemed to be our thing

When a foolish adult

We needed to follow the cult

Live it up with the Jones’s

Our possessions certainly owning us

When a wise fool

We talk of the old rules

How we were smarter than most

& of our achievements we did boast

When we lay down below

In that grave or shallow hole

Will someone speak up in our defense

Or will the tears wash away all pretense

_______________________________________________

The peak of an ice mountain

A snowball rolled down to the sea

The murderous noise that followed

The humans never again to be seen

Wiped out from the frozen avalanche

No markers for those graves to be placed

A part of the foundation now

Their memories never to be erased

_____________________________________________

A nightmare from which

None would awake

The crust of the earth

Rattled & quaked

Day turned to night

All that could

Took fast flight

Leaving the rest

To battle & fight

Waging a war

That was out of our sight

__________________________________________

“Please” I muttered

More like a faint sputter

From my lips the sound did roll

I was begging for a release

Something that would bring me peace

& I knew he could save my soul

“Please” I said again

This time with more feeling

Asking for this ache to end

_____________________________________

When you blink

You could miss the sync

Between your heart & mind

When you blink

You might feel the succinct

Coordination of space & time

When you blink

You must not think

Of pain that fills the rhyme

When you blink

Walk don’t creep

Magic mysteries you will find

_________________________________________

He was a fat & sassy

orange tabby,

who always managed to snuggle up

when times were tough.

He’d nip at my cheeks

before purring so sweet.

He was more than a cat

who always hung on my back;

he was a friend who could

suspend my tears to the very end.

_________________________________________

With

Or without you

I’ll keep going

Keep breathing

Until this is all through

I’ll hold on to me

You hold on to you

Whether together

Or apart

I’ll see it to the end

Even after this love

Is dead & gone

My heart will mend

Even if you aren’t here to help it

__________________________________________

Let us go

Where all

The veins meet

All me to seep

Walk a new path

To what you’ve hidden

Way down deep

Tell me your secrets

Let me revel in what you keep

Allow me to fall asleep

To that sweet beat

Of a heart

I truly see

______________________________________

What you see

Cannot be

My physicalities

Are not the make up of me

Breathe in my words

Feel what I dare to disturb

Let the emotions roll over your body

It is there where you’ll find ME

_________________________________________

Read me like a book

Quiver against my pages

Breathe until your core is shook

Finger the soft chapters

Until the print burns

Beneath your tips

Shake out the meanings

Imagine what I was thinking

Go slowly so you don’t finish

Until you’ve reached your limits

__________________________________________

The moment you sighed

You caught a glimpse

Of the passion in my eyes

You felt the electricity pulse

Beating its own drum

Underneath my skin

Soft soothing thrum

It was only a moment

Frozen in time

Something you can only say

Was utterly sublime

__________________________________________

Suggest a future

With the to of us

Times at fast pace

Moments spent in leisure

Carve out a path

Along the ridges of my skin

Make your mark indelibly

Give me your kind of pain

Force my eyes to see

All that we could be

Plan it with me in mind

& that day we’ll soon live

__________________________________________

Well all search

For that 1

To make our heart better

To wash away the pain

To lift us up when we need

To remove all the stains

We all search

High & low

Looking for what

We’ll never know

Trying to connect

In a world that’s a show

Reaching out in darkness

We are all fools

Didn’t you know

____________________________________________

Her anger had built

A growing rage

Full of salt & silt

Wrongs done her

Gathered in strength

Forming a sea

Of murderous energy

A wall of darkness

Flanked with

Never ending flames

All it took

Was just 1 touch

& lava would flow

Destroying all that was

____________________________________________

Kiss the toad

Many people

Had told

Make him a prince

Allow him to fit

Give him patience

Cure his ignorance

She did as warned

Only to be un-charmed

That toad was

No prince knight savior

1 who deserved no kiss

So to the swamp she returned

Never to believe what she was told

_____________________________________________

They had tried to teach her

To have a hopeful heart

Set aside her fears

But time & again

Her light of hope

Would dim

Snuffed & blunted

By the world

Betrayed & foiled

By those she’d known

Her hope was now

A tiny spark

Lost in a sea

Of dark & doom

______________________________________________

Connected through electricity

The two chords completed a duality

An unending circle full of purpose

Only to be cut short from the nerves

Separation to be the quickest course

The severing of chords that weren’t meant to fit

_________________________________________________

A whisper raced along

Saturn’s rings

Singing a low tone

In the darkness of space

With no soul left in that place

The whisper survived

From another time

Only to repeat

And forever live

___________________________________________________

Sometimes I’m here

Sometimes I’m not

There’s no more air

In my atmosphere

And so I might just go away

Hoping I won’t be gone to stay

The world outside is a burning blaze

I might just stand still & watch it

As the destruction engulfs my gaze

____________________________________________

too much

but

never enough

you’ve lost

what

was never yours

to begin with

________________________________________

Give me the moon

& its sad somber tune

Let its light

Lead me to what is right

Allow its freedom

To ring true in a symphony

Could I be

The only 1 who hears

Its magical melody

_____________________________________

Her words

Had been but

A vessel for

What her heart

Yearned for

Her voice

Was only

A whisper

Of what was

Never to be again

Her actions

Were nothing but

Motions

Of a broken heart

Never to be repaired

Her songs

Were the melodies

Of memories & dreams

That could never be

_____________________________________

I kept cozy

In my bed

Streaming tears

Full of dread

What would happen now

Where had I run a foul

Had my heart

Jumped to quickly

Had my mind

Fooled me silly

No matter what

I found myself stuck

The Pit had dragged me in

Yet again

There was no light

Than the one I would make

_______________________________

As she looked down

At her left hand

She could see

The mark

Left by the ring

She had worn

For so long

That love was gone

Replaced

By a love of her own

___________________________________

He had dug a ditch

Thru her mind

Thru her heart

He did find

The least scarred parts

Somewhere he could forage

A special place

To tear her apart

Filled it with lies

She dared to believe

Sighs & places that

Hid all the things

She lacked

__________________________________

She laid her palm flat on his heart,

feeling it beat through his shirt.

As a tear slid from her eye,

she shook her head

before saying goodbye.

His heart had never belonged to her,

& in this moment,

she knew she had to let him go.

______________________________________

in a sea of swells

my body was lifted

then it fell

deep down into

an ocean of fear

my hands cling to rocks

then fade & disappear

my voice swallowed with thoughts

as slowly my heart stops

this watery grave

has nothing left to save

_____________________________________

you can’t break my heart

if I don’t allow it to fall apart

____________________________________

if this is the end

I scream “Let it be”

My heart is too fragile

To longer be allowed to beat

______________________________________

I had wondered

all these years

where was this love

never holding it in my hand

never feeling it from above

walking the path alone

moonlight was my only song

when I reached the end of the road

I was the only love known

_________________________________________

men who love

the thrill of the chase

easily get bored

and soon make haste

____________________________________

In the distant horizon

Life recovers from the silence

Hearts begin to beat again

Smiles & hugs from well meaning friends

The darkness fades & the light peaks

Yesterday is gone & tomorrow seems bleak

But the future is there

For those willing to see

_____________________________________

Taste me

Tempt me

Let me feel your lips

Warm me from my insides

Make me quiver & shake

Allow your hands

To glide over each curve

Explore every inch

Every ridge

Read the scars

That are written in braille

Feel my body

As my heart exhales

_____________________________

Not just the flesh

Not just the words

Emotions were a mess

This was something More

Not just lips

Not just fingertips

Minds that matched

Causing breaths to hitch

All it took

Was that one kiss

And both were shook

As far as their souls could reach

_________________________________

Her tongue

Sweet cherries

A seductive tasty dance

The more she licked

The sweeter they became

And she couldn’t wait to bite

_________________________________

He had chosen to cherish her

She had chosen to believe him

So he placed the collar around her neck

And she handed him the leash

______________________________

i’m quiet because

the storm has me

that’s when i learn

new ways to breathe

_________________________

Once filled with colors

Now the world is only

A variety of grays

Since she’s be gone

No rain, only clouds

No winds, just a soft breeze

And there’s something missing

Deep down in me

She went far away

She couldn’t bear to stay

Left me alone

With a sad song

____________________________

He had asked me

where all my love had gone

I answered him solemnly

didn’t you hear my sad song

______________________________

And when she could no longer dream

He rode up on the moon’s beams

Dabbed his paintbrush into the dark sky

Writing his love for her

With twinkling little lights

___________________________________

Her heart felt her fall

Into the demon’s clutches

She surrendered all

Fed by the flames of desire

She would not burn

In Hell’s fires

The demon wanted her pure soul

She craved his sins

And to know them well

Two halves of a whole

Was how the song would go

Claimed Burnt Broken Sold

______________________________________

“We all want that kind of love. The kind that accepts all your good qualities, along with your flaws. It’s the holy grail of true love. It’s what literally everyone in the world searches high and low for.”

“It’s just a myth of something that never was.”

_________________________________________________________

Once blood red

& full of love

Now evaporates

Into sandy smudges

Once beating like a drum

Now is dust

Blown away like it never was

________________________________

The Time

Is Now

Close your eyes

Shut your mouth

Don’t go outside

Don’t move around

It’s the End

No tomorrows

No yesterdays

The Time

Is Now

Don’t let it fade

Lift your head

And be brave

Insanity is just

Out those doors

Make sure

to keep Yours

_____________________________

there will be

no rainbows

when

the earth

is scorched

and

all humanity

is done

_________________________

birds are chirping

but the clouds are gray

no one is moving

time stands still today

a collective holding their breath

wondering when this will all go away

clench to the ones you love

we have no knowledge

of what’s to come in the next days

______________________________

one day here

the next day gone

one minute a moment experienced

the next just a ghostly internet spirit

__________________________________

My mound

His hand

His ridge

My cavern

My tongue

His taste

His fingers

My haste

My sigh

His growl

His kiss

My meow

My air

His breath

His command

My request

My submission

His control

His devotion

My all

_________________________

What she appears yo be

Sweet angel at peace

Smiles instead of weeps

But what you won’t know

She’ll never dare to show

Is what she feels inside

She’ll always hide

Behind the disguise

A soul left in limbo

A song you’ll never hear flow

Tears that fall

Making her heart glow

______________________________

dropping a rock

at the edge of the sea

only to watch

as it disappears with ease

wondering how

it would no longer be missed now

would anyone feel the same

if that rock i had became

____________________________

i used to have so many things to say

until the moment came and went

then i realized you had gone away

______________________________

She gathered the materials in her hands,

holding her gaze lower than his.

Her body slowly lifted from the chair,

but her voice was nothing but air.

She didn’t have a clue of how to respond,

so she left him standing there in complete denial.

_________________________________

There were borders

For her security

Boundaries in place

To quell unfamiliarity

Chains that held her

Tightly to the core

Bars that squeezed

Her wings from being full

A lock & key

That no one should ever see

All to keep her safe

Allowing her to grow in that special place

_____________________________________

A protrusion left by a contusion

A scar revealed from a previous wound

An imperfection in a sea of neglect

A veritable ridge that had lasting effects

A mound of insecurities that lead to boundless maturities

A mind that had been altered from the times life faltered

_______________________________________________

feel the ridges & the mounds

as our hands touch for the first time

immediate electric connection

it was the beginning of self reflection

a mere moment set in time

grace of space left undefined

a second there to meld our minds

where is the love we dare to truly find

____________________________________________

the flowers you laid

are now dead upon my grave

drained of life as my body is

slowly wilting against the currents wind

no tears left to cry

only clouds in the sky

you’ll forget me as time passes by

like the petals i’ll turn to dust

no one knowing why

________________________________________

be the whisper in my dreams

be the temptation I dare to believe

be the comfort in a silent hug

be the heart I wish to love

____________________________________

Cherish the little girl in me

Ravage the Sexy Primal Beast

Caress the Sweet Angel you see

Respect the Phoenix’s Individuality

Don’t you EVER make me weep

Because those Tears of Pain

Morph into Hell’s Rain

__________________________________________

a lifetime is available

if only

you would open your arms

to let go of it all

____________________________________

the art a body could make

if only in the right hands

it could shiver & shake

it could scream like an electric guitar

or sing like a violin unmarred

moan like an old church organ

if only the right hands

were available to it

such music a body would make

___________________________________

I didn’t know what love was

Until I became isolated from hugs

___________________________________

and in the span of a heart beat…all hope was gone

_______________________________________

Not just the skin

But what is hidden within

Not just a kiss

But a long luxurious taste

Not just lust

But a need to be filled with must

Not just love

But a connection sent from up above

_____________________________________

You gripped

Around me

Sighs dripping

From my mouth

Turn to pleas

Hands gripping mine

Could this be

What a connection can do

Between two such beings

______________________________________

Kindred spirits

Bound to different realms

Soulful sisters

With hearts they often shared

Though separated by worlds

They come together through words

Leaning on one another

Until strength is gained & recovered

Sisters through & through

This no one could ever disprove

__________________________________

paint a field of green

it’s time

to rebuild the dream

_________________________________

She sung of love & loss

Sitting upon that hilltop

The ravens heard her cry

& decided with her to sit by

The clouds hung heavy & low

As the wind with coldness did flow

Only sadness held her heart back

She would not jump from where she sat

____________________________________

I no longer saw

A reflection of myself

When I looked in the mirror

A single tear fell

An angel was what

Every human had seen

But it was the demon inside

That truly was me

Forever that duality

Always think before I speak

Forever lost in reality

Fantasies were just dreams

______________________________________

I donated my words

To soothe those with hurt

I donated my time

To hug & hold until all was fine

I donated my love

Put loved ones above

I donated my soul

I had no use for it anymore

______________________________

the odds seemed

insurmountable

but ahead

they would forge

the fear was

palpable

but together

they would soar

the love appeared

indescribable

but their souls

knew to fight for it

_________________________________

don’t let Fear question what your Soul instinctively Knows

_________________________________________

Fist full of hair

Knees trembling

As he stared

Time & time again

Lick by lick

She sucked him in

He always relished the show

& she knew

He’d never let her go

When her blue eyes caught his attention

It was MINE that he whispered

_______________________________________

A Kiss can be Sex

He said

My knees buckled

With excitement & dread

He slid a hand in my hair

Cupped my face

& then stared

It was the beginning

& we wanted it to last

He leaned in to touch me

My heart fell then soared

Because after all this time

It would finally be free

______________________________________

His teeth grazed my neck

in that special spot

that caused my body

to shake, shiver, &

become immediately wet.

How long had it been since

I had a man take control &

make me want to sin

like never before?

Nothing mattered now.

I didn’t have to wait

to here him growl.

_______________________________

Press the button

Turn the knob

Whisper all those dirty things

You’ll do to my body

Settle Your hand

Possessively on my neck

Curl Your rough fingers

Around my breast

Lean in a kiss me deeply

Slow down take Your time

Show me with no doubt

i’m Yours & You are Mine

__________________________________

We didn’t

need any words

Because

together

We worked

__________________________________

His soul would be

The unfathomable depth

I would seek

Skidding along the edges

Swimming deep into his misgivings

Basking N the glow of his love

Attaching to his anchor during storms

No matter the day

Or the weather that would come

I knew I was safe

Swaddled in his love

_____________________________________

I dragged it along behind me

Broken, bloody & bruised

It always knew how to find me

It was quite a heavy load

But straight ahead I would go

Once I reached the top of the hill

I peered down at my heart

Turned away & left it

It would be the albatross I forgot

_______________________________________

I had a hunch

A gnawing

Deep in my stomach

Something wasn’t right

Some pieces weren’t flush

The story never took flight

Facts were discarded without a fuss

The fog made it all unclear

Until the sunlight appeared

What was spoken was not the truth

Now I had proof

________________________________________

Whisper those sweet words

Make me believe I am no fool

Show me how much you adore me

Help me believe that this love is true

__________________________________________

Her eyes watered

His thumb wiped the tear

He asked why was she sad

She admitted it was only fear

“Why are you afraid?” He queried

“Because I’ve been waiting for you

All my life”

__________________________________________

He was a long lost mythical creature.

A fallen angel with the heart of a gentleman.

His wings were torn & tattered like my own,

but his soul was reinforced with invisible steel.

And his words knew just how to heal.

_________________________________________

He caressed my cheek

In the moment I was most weak

He peered into my eyes

As the storm raging within

I could no longer disguise

He didn’t say a word

We were passed adjectives & verbs

His heart felt mine

His soul touched what was divine

_________________________________________

It was a moment

A mere second

That scraped along

Time & space

But it was felt

Instantaneously

The fear

The loss

The hope

The scope

It was the moment

Love was born

It was the second

Healing replaced scorn

_________________________________________

we talked for hours

laughed until we cried

touched on every scar

admitted every defeat

how we were fooled by our pride

said every secret

revealed lost fantasies

talked of the ones who hurt our heart

about the times we fell apart

we said all there was to say

in the end we both stayed

_______________________________________

He calls me the fire

& He’s My Gasoline

These to never tire

Only build & bleed

Passion in our minds

Our demons live & breathe

Played out in words that rhyme

Both eager to please

A stroke of a tongue

Lick of the lash

A sigh then a moan

This moment will always last

_______________________________________

whispers of dreams

spoken softly

in the moon’s beams

limbs intertwined

hot breaths

so sweetly sublime

hearts beating as one

the melody

would never be unsung

blood burns like fire

beneath the heat

of a soul’s long desire

_____________________________________

push the hair from my face

tell me it’ll all be OK

as you wipe the tears off my cheek

help my soul not to worry

cause your the shoulder

i can lean on for eternity

_________________________________

Tastingly

Tauntingly

Temptingly

He touched me

Tortuously

Tantalizingly

Treacherously

my body betrayed me

Gaspingly

Givingly

Gloriously

Our souls seeped

The fantasy would now be

Our reality

_________________________________

Leaning my head

Against His shoulder

The fresh sting of pain

Left my flesh & heart to smolder

Without words I instinctively knew

He’d allow me to lean

While i opened my soul wide

Just for Him to view

________________________________

Her heart had been mislead

He was no angel, no saint, no demon

No knight on a white horse

No tarnished armor or sword

He was never what she dreamed he would be

But he was

The soul hers never seemed to reach

_________________________________________

Hidden in plain sight

No one knew

No one tried

To reach out

To touch her heart

No one cared

Not even enough

She wanders alone

In the shadows she knows

Allowing sunlight to glow

But in the dark

Is where her soul is froze

____________________________________

The music needed no lyrics

Only the intention of escaping

One note bleeding emotion free

With the crescendo it’s final release

____________________________________

His fingertip skidded

Along my skin

Tracing every curve

Until

He found the bump

The indention

A small lump

The scar of my past

That would always last

His lips replaced his fingers

A kiss to that place

He eyes said they accepted me

My flaws were perfectly shaped

_______________________________________

Deep in the valley

You could view

The detailed elevations

From down there

It could be believed

That you couldn’t reach

Those expectations

The peak so close to the sky

Where you were

The sun didn’t shine

But each day you try to climb

One foot ahead

Never behind

_____________________________________

The earth shook

The sea quaked

Then the eruption

Took center stage

Spewing fire &

Hot volcanic blood

The sky turned red

& we knew

The end was upon us

_______________________________

come come the waves

& with the wind’s graze

sing a song that will amaze

allowing my soul to be at peace

let the colors of the sky

reds yellows blues & grays

ignite my sight

allowing me to wish i could stay

but the whitecaps call me home

to that watery throne

time to move along

___________________________________

the waves they crash

white caps upon the sandy shore

the sun barely peaks out

forcing my heart to no longer sleep

the sea calls to me

I know that in this watery grave

I will someday be

but for now

in this moment

I’ll watch the waves come & then retreat

________________________________________

Give me

The majesty

Every book

Is worth a read

Let it expose you to

The lives, the loves

You never knew

Let it open your eyes

To the world of pure disguise

Let it fill your heart

Let it create tears to fall

Open that book

Read it from the hook

Let your life be shook

___________________________________

A revered soul

Is one that knows

Time is only

A sense of fluidity

It is not some

Concrete conundrum

Where nothing changes

No one grows

Yes a smart soul knows

Things can & do fluctuate

& with learning

We must appreciate

Time will not be

Always what we see

__________________________________

The cellos filled my ears,

forcing me to escape from my tears.

The music swallowed up

the silence that resounded

through this house.

He’d left only moments before,

but the hole in my heart stung

until it became sore.

____________________________________

With stardust on my feet

I skated around Saturn’s rings

Destined not to think

Of all the memories

Long since behind me

My body, my soul

Belonged out here in the cold

With stars twinkling in my eyes

Here in this space

Is where I’ll forever fly

_____________________________________

Don’t blink

Or you may miss it

It won’t stay there

Like an ellipsis

It is but

A small fraction of hurt

If you blink

You’ll think it never was

______________________________

Uncategorized

Beautiful

sunset colorful

 

Beautiful is not

A word that describes me

Beautiful is not

What I see

Beautiful is not

Something that’s within me

Beautiful is not

What I’ll ever be

 

Beautiful is a flower

Or a lovely spring breeze

Beautiful is a painting

That helps my soul release

Beautiful is a melody

And words from which they spring

Beautiful is a child’s smile

And that’s no longer me

 

Beautiful is love

That comes true from the heart

Beautiful is caring

When the world falls apart

Beautiful is sharing

When you barely have enough to start

Beautiful is knowing

What you are and what you are not

 

Beautiful is not

Sharing your body

But not your heart

Beautiful is not

Where you hide

From your inner thoughts

Beautiful is not

Tears, sadness,

Or what’s in the dark

 

Beautiful is

When you share

Your mind, your thoughts

Beautiful is

Taking a stand

When you know what’s right

Beautiful is

Facing your loneliness

Even when you hide in plain sight

Beautiful is

Being what you are

And not faking what you are not

 

Beautiful is not

A word that describes me

Beautiful is not

What the mirror shows me

Beautiful is not

My laugh, smile or thoughts

Beautiful is

All those things

That I am not